


Breaking Point

by AmyTheWarlock



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Domestic Violence, Insecure Alec Lightwood, M/M, Malec, Protective Isabelle Lightwood, Protective Magnus Bane, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, alec lightwood - Freeform, magnus bane - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-10-02
Packaged: 2020-10-07 21:41:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20463827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmyTheWarlock/pseuds/AmyTheWarlock
Summary: Things haven't been good between Alec and his boyfriend Rhett for a while now, Alec knew that what was going on wasn't right, that it probably wasn't good for him, but how could he walk away from the only person that saw him as a somebody and not a nobody?Perhaps, with the help of a friend that Alec didn't really know he had, he'd be able to see that he did deserve better and that most importantly, better was achievable. To get there though, a breaking point has to be reached so that he can finally understand that walking away is a perfectly okay thing to do.





	1. The Familiar

**Author's Note:**

> Hi Everyone! 
> 
> Finally, I am back from summer camp!! Which also means I am back with angsty and sad fics for you all... one day I will write a happy one I promise...  
This fic does tackle some sensitive areas regarding physical and mental domestic abuse, if you think that this will trigger you or make you uncomfortable please do not read it. I don't want to upset anyone.  
I hope I have done this topic justice in the way I've written it, I'm slightly nervous, but I hope you enjoy it and if you want to live-tweet it use #BPfic I love to see what you guys think. 
> 
> Have a great day! 
> 
> Amy x

Chapter 1: The Familiar

Coffee, it’s aroma, it’s flavour, it’s appearance, it’s familiar, something that determines milestones for the day, a cup with breakfast, then at 10am, then lunch, 3:30pm and then it’s almost time. It’s almost 5:30, the time of the day that Alec secretly looks forward to more than his regular cups of coffee, he knows he shouldn’t, he knows that it’s wrong, but he can’t help himself, because at 5:30, like clockwork, he knows he’ll be making a sweetened green iced tea with half a shot of lemon for his most regular customer. Magnus.

Alec smiled to himself as the chimes on the door rang taking a quick glance at his watch, 5:30 on the dot, of course it was. He didn’t turn around straight away, he didn’t want to seem keen, he couldn’t seem keen, his colleagues who consisted of his sister and her ever so slightly irritating boyfriend knew perfectly well that he had a boyfriend of his own. Meaning that Alec couldn’t flirt, it was morally wrong even if his boyfriend Rhett was a colossal dickhead. Alec sang along nonchalantly to the song that was playing over the speaker in the café that he worked at, waiting for the signal that Magnus was ready for him to take his order.

“I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, but that voice of yours does not belong somewhere like this.”

Alec turned at the sound of Magnus’ voice, his face deadly serious, “Augh, you again, I thought you’d have had enough of this place by now,” he teased.

“Stop flirting with me. I’ll have a sweetened green iced tea…”

“…With half a shot of lemon, large.” Alec finished.

Magnus raised his eyebrow at Alec, “One day I’m going to order something different just to throw you off.”

“Good for you. Sitting in or taking out?” Alec asked the question despite knowing that Friday’s were the only day when Magnus sat in, he just didn’t want to seem like he was into him, not when he couldn’t be seen flirting with him, they were just friends and that was all he’d ever be. 

“Sitting in.”

“Sure thing, I’ll bring it over.”

Alec watched as Magnus took a seat by the window before he turned and started to prepare the drink, god that man sent his head into a spin. He told himself every day that they were just friends, that there was nothing more to it than that, but the more he looked at him, the more he spoke to him, the less convincing the voice in his head became. He had Rhett though, they lived together, things weren’t perfect, they couldn’t be much further from perfect, but it wasn’t like he could just get up and leave. Not with Rhett, that would end in disaster.

Alec jumped as the door opened and closed quickly and the familiar “ALEC” that came with it. Shit.

“How much have you got today?” Rhett asked as he walked around the counter, his face flustered, his body language showing clearly that he’d had a bad day.

Alec swallowed slowly, “Not much.”

Rhett rolled his eyes, “There’s only one fucking customer in here Alec, what’s the point in you even being here?”

“It was busier this morning,” Alec said taking a step backward, cursing to himself as he knocked Magnus’ drink, wishing that he could just disappear as he watched it fall to the floor.

“Just give me the money,” Rhett spat, reaching into Alec’s back pocket and pulling out his wallet for him. Alec flinched at the movement, trying to ignore Magnus’ eyes that were intently watching the situation. “You should clean this up if you get fired we’re fucked.”

Alec nodded obediently, fully aware that he looked as though he was 5 years old and taking orders from a teacher, not his boyfriend, but also fully aware that if he responded any differently it would only come back to bite him later. “I’ll see you tonight.”

“I’m going out.”

“Where to?” his voice was shaky, Rhett never went out on Friday’s, every other night yes, but never Fridays.

“None of your business, you don’t get to know where I’m going, this doesn’t work like that.”

“Sorry Rhett, I just, it doesn’t matter,” Alec said, stopping himself before his voice started to crack, getting upset only made things worse for him.

“Okay, well, I’m going now.” Rhett said as Alec turned to grab the mop from the cupboard, “Where’s my kiss?”

Alec composed himself as he turned around again to kiss Rhett quickly, he didn’t want to make a scene, he had to kiss him. If he didn’t kiss him it would almost be telling himself that things weren’t right either.

“See you in the morning Alec, thanks for the money,” his boyfriend's voice was softer now, friendlier, doing what Rhett told him to do was always worth it just to not hear the harsher tones any longer.

“Sure thing,” Alec whispered as he turned his back from him, only allowing himself to breathe once he was sure that the door had closed, and that Rhett was long gone.

As he mopped up the floor he allowed a couple of tears to fall, sometimes he just couldn’t hold them in and the store was quiet he had the time to let them out. He also knew he needed to get out, he wasn’t stupid, what was going on between the two of them wasn’t okay, but what also wasn’t okay was that Rhett was Alec’s first love, how was he supposed to turn away from that? It wasn’t like he had any other options, he needed someone to want him, and since his parents died he’d only ever had his sister. Yes, she’d always be there for him, but it wasn’t the same thing. Rhett picked him out of a crowd, he chose Alec, he wanted Alec to be his boyfriend and Alec couldn’t imagine anyone else doing that. He was just the guy who worked in the café, no one knew who he was, he was a nobody and Rhett was the only person that saw him as a somebody.

Alec rubbed his eyes to try and mask the fact that he’d been crying as he remade Magnus’ drink, of course, it had to happen when Magnus was here too. He looked pathetic, and now he’d made him wait an extra 10 minutes for his drink, everything was going completely wrong. He sighed deeply as he carried the order over to where Magnus was sat hoping that he wouldn’t strike up a conversation with him.

“Sorry for the wait,” he said timidly as he placed it on the table.

“Was that your boyfriend?”

“I have to get back to the counter.”

Magnus rolled his eyes, “There’s no one else here. Sit down for a bit.”

“I can’t Magnus.”

“Alec,” Magnus couldn’t help how Alec flinched when he said his name, he’d said it firm because he wanted him to breathe for a second, not to scare him. “Alexander,” he said slowly, that was better.

“How did you know that was my name?”

“Wild guess.”

“No one really calls me that.”

Magnus smiled, “Well now they do. Come on sit down with me.”

Alec shook his head, “I can’t, I just, I can’t.”

“I’m the customer, and as your customer, I say you need a break and the customer is always right.” Magnus watched out of the window, scanning for any sight of Rhett, “He got in a taxi, he’s nowhere around.”

Alec sighed, “Fine.”

The two of them sat opposite each other, Alec avoided looking directly at Magnus who was staring directly at him, the usual banter between them none existent as neither of them were really in the mood. Alec was still composing himself and Magnus was trying his best to figure out if Alec was happy in his relationship. It was silent for a few minutes as they both soaked up the remainder of the tension that Rhett had left within the café before Magnus finally plucked up the courage to speak.

“Do you love him?” he asked, it was bold, but after witnessing the altercation he was finding it hard to understand how anyone could love someone like that.

Alec looked up from the table, “I used to.”

“You could leave him.”

“It’s not that easy, he…” Alec looked at his wrist, it was still swollen from the night before, pulsing with pain that he’d become almost used to because this was his life, “I can’t just leave.”

Magnus couldn’t help but notice where Alec’s eyes had wandered, a sudden emptiness entering his stomach as he became aware that despite Alec’s underplaying of the situation, whatever was going on in his house was worse than he was saying. “Can I see your wrist?”

“It’s fine, it’s just bruised.”

“It doesn’t look ‘just bruised’, it shouldn’t be that swollen.”

“What are you a doctor?”

Magnus grinned, it was kind of funny that despite them seeing each other pretty much every day for the past 6 months or so that Magnus’ profession had never cropped up in conversation. “As a matter of fact, yes.”

“Seriously?” Alec said, his eyes widening.

“Yeah I work across the street. Does that surprise you?”

“I suppose you just don’t really look like the doctor type, you’re so young.”

Magnus shrugged casually, “I’m just really smart and I’m not that young. Not that it matters, I’m smart enough to know that your wrist isn’t just bruised and needs sorting.”

“Well I can’t afford to get it seen to, so it’s just going to have to stay this way.”

“What time are you working tomorrow?”

“I start at 9.”

“8 am, my office, free of charge, just don’t tell anyone.”

“Magnus, you have actual patients to be treating.”

“You’d be an actual patient if the American health system wasn’t so stupid.”

“You could lose your job”

“I’ll be careful.”

“Magnus…”

“…That’s the end of it. 8 am okay?”

Alec looked at the practical stranger that had extended so much kindness to him in such a short space of time, “Okay, where’s your office?”

Magnus grinned, “Give me your number, I’ll text you it.” He commended himself for how smooth he had just been. He wanted Alec to have his number, not just because he was incredibly attractive but because it meant that if he ever needed any help or anything at all, there was someone that he could call.

* * *

_“I’m falling, in all the good times I find myself longing for change, in all the bad times I fear myself, I’m in the deep end…”_

The sound of the door buzzing interrupted Alec as he quickly put his guitar down and headed for the door, his stomach churning as the prepared himself for the arrival of Rhett who was probably completely shit faced and horny as hell. He looked through the peephole and breathed a sigh of relief as he was graced with the presence of his sister who was holding a six-pack of beer in one hand and a stack of DVDs in the other.

“That sounded good,” Izzy said as she embraced Alec in a quick hug before making herself comfortable on the couch.

“What are you doing here?”

“I missed you.”

Alec raised his eyebrows at the dark-haired and red-lipped girl sprawled across his sofa, he couldn’t lie to himself, he was kind of glad she was here. “How was your day off?”

Izzy shrugged as she knocked one of the beer caps off using the table handing the bottle to Alec if he’d tried to do that it would look nowhere near as cool. “I did the laundry, the dishes, went to the park, it was boring which is why I came to see you. How was work?”

Alec looked down at the floor for a split second, but it was enough for Izzy to know that whatever he was about to say next was going to be a lie. “It was fine.”

“Alec. How was work?”

“Can’t we just have a quiet night in without discussing my shit show of a life?” Alec said lifting Izzy’s legs up and sitting down next to her.

“Did he do that?”

“Do what?”

“Your wrist is twice it’s normal size.”

“I fell down the stairs and landed on it funny.”

It was Izzy’s turn to raise her eyebrows, “For fucks sake Alec, you need to get out of here.”

“You know I can’t.”

“Yes you can, you’re holding on to the past. Rhett’s changed and even if he did stop treating you like this it wouldn’t make things right.”

“What am I supposed to do, go live on the streets?”

“You could stay with me and Simon for a while.”

“But not forever. I’m a barista Izzy, I have no money and Rhett controls the finances…”

“…He controls his alcohol allowance.”

“Izzy…”

“…No Alec, you need to sort this. You can’t live like this forever.”

Alec ran his hand through his hair impatiently, “Well nothings going to change anytime soon. Just put a film on, I’m done talking about this.”

“Where is he now?”

“Out.”

“Where?”

“I don’t know, it’s none of my business.”

“He’s your boyfriend.”

“Izzy, please, just leave it.”

Izzy sighed and got up from the couch sliding in one of the DVDs, she hated that her bother just couldn’t seem to see why he needed to get out of the situation he was in. It was like he was oblivious to how bad things had gotten, to how unhappy that she could tell he was, he didn’t care. He wanted to cling on to the old Rhett, to how things used to be but that wasn’t healthy, 5 years ago things were completely different Alec just didn’t want to see that. The movie started to play but Izzy didn’t really watch it as she watched her brother, he was all over the place, he acted like he was coping but his hands shook constantly, he jumped when he was touched, or people said his name. It wasn’t right, and she just wanted to protect him because if the roles were reversed she knew he would protect her as well.

“Take the morning off tomorrow Alec, you look exhausted.”

“Charming.”

“You know what I mean, Simon will cover.”

“We need the money.”

“You’ll still get payed and you can come in the afternoon.”

Alec yawned slowly stretching out his arms, “Okay whatever,” he gave in as he drifted off to sleep.

Izzy watched as her brother finally looked peaceful, relaxed, his chest rising and falling slowly. It saddened her to know that he was only this peaceful when he was asleep and that when he was awake he was constantly on edge about what was going to happen next. She’d tried everything but there didn’t seem to be any reasoning, she’d wondered if things could have been different, perhaps if Alec hadn’t relied so much on Rhett when their parents died then it wouldn’t be so hard for him to break free. Questioning things like that though, it was pointless, what-ifs and maybes didn’t change anything, so instead, Alec was stuck in a toxic relationship that seemingly nothing could pull him out of.


	2. Dr Bane

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter. Magnus Bane as a doctor is something I can definitely get behind tbh. 
> 
> Thanks for reading! And I hope you have had or are having a great day! 
> 
> Amy x

Chapter 2: Dr. Bane

Alec woke up his head slightly groggy from the amount of beer that Izzy had forced down his neck as a way of distracting him from his incredibly below average life. Thankfully, Rhett hadn’t come home, he didn’t like it when Alec hung out with Izzy, probably because it meant that he couldn’t kick Alec around as much, something that he enjoyed more when he was drunk. So, his lack of reappearance meant that Alec could have the bed to himself and not worry about the consequences until he woke up, which he did at 7, to the bed still empty and a text from an unknown number with the address for a doctors office, Magnus.

Alec propped himself up and looked down at his injury which seemed to be just as swollen as it had been the day before. He couldn’t lie, he considered not turning up if Rhett came back and he wasn’t at home all hell would break loose, but something inside of him persuaded him to go. Rhett could have gone straight to work for all he knew and maybe he could play it off as going to get groceries or something. He yawned and stretched out his arms as he forced himself out of the warm sheets of the bed and dragged his body over to the shower hoping the warm water would make the cold air, less shocking. He also wanted to make sure that he smelt nice for Magnus, something that he knew he shouldn’t be thinking about but also couldn’t help thinking about. Magnus was an attractive guy, that was undeniable.

Once he was ready for the day Alec slid out the house quietly through the back door, for no reason other than that he was worried he’d bump into Rhett if he used his usual routes, again it was stupid, he’d be walking in public, but he was sick and tired of confrontation and he didn’t have the energy for another fight. The familiar feeling of anxiety intensified as Alec stood outside Magnus’ office his eyes fixated on the plaque reading ‘Dr. Bane’ next to the door. Magnus Bane, Alec thought to himself, that was some name. He inhaled sharply before knocking firmly on the door twice which opened for him promptly afterward.

“Morning Alexander.”

Alec relaxed at the openness of Magnus’ smiling face, instantly putting him the most at ease that he had been all morning, “Morning,” he said allowing himself to smile back every so slightly.

“Well come in then,” Magnus said, gesturing dramatically with his arm for Alec to follow him, “Take a seat on the bed.”

Alec froze, his legs turning to tree stumps rooting him to the ground, not letting him move a step forward. It hadn’t crossed his mind before, he just assumed that this wouldn’t freak him out, that being in a hospital wouldn’t be a big deal, but the bed, the medical equipment, Magnus in his white coat, it was all too much.

“I think…”

Magnus glanced over at Alec whose cheeks had gone from being flushed red to white in almost seconds, his hands were shaking by his side, he was either going to vomit or pass out. Magnus took a step forward and placed a reassuring hand on Alec’s shoulder, the touch of which sent shivers down Alec’s spine, different shivers though, not the ones of fear that Rhett’s hands made.

“You’re going to be okay, do you think you’re going to be sick?” Magnus said as he guided Alec to the bed helping him up on to it. Alec shook his head in response. “Okay, just give it a couple of minutes.”

Alec nodded his head, he was such an idiot, coming here was a bad idea, it had only opened up old wounds that he thought had scared over, but apparently that wasn’t true. Now here he was freaking out in front of the only person that had shown any concern for him in the past 5 years other than his sister. “I’m wasting your time Magnus. I should just go,” he said, attempting to get up off the bed only to be gently pushed back down.

“Don’t be silly, you’re not wasting my time. Let me have a look at your wrist. Can I?” Magnus wheeled over the stool he was sat on and took Alec’s hand in his, examining it carefully, “Does this hurt?” Alec shook his head. “What about here?” there was no response, “Here?” Alec flinched slightly. “Okay, well I don’t think it’s broken which is a good thing, it’s probably just a light sprain. Was it the pain in your wrist that made you go dizzy?”

“No, I just, well apparently I don’t like hospitals anymore.”

Magnus nodded, it was pretty common, a lot of people hate coming to the doctors even if it’s just for a fever or something mild, there’s always that fear that something could go wrong. “Okay, well I’m going to put this bandage around your wrist, it’s not going to be set like a cast, but it should give your wrist some support and hopefully help it heal up quicker then it would without.”

“It’ll be fine, I can’t, fuck.”

“What’s wrong?” Magnus said, Alec’s eyebrows had become furrowed, the stress inside of him manifesting itself in every way possible.

“If I wear this, you know what? It doesn’t matter, I’ll be fine without it.”

Magnus watched Alec as he tried to get up from the bed before it clicked as to why he was so reluctant, he sighed as he stopped Alec from leaving the room, “Hold up, I have an idea.” He fumbled in one of the drawers and took out a wrist support, “Wear this when you’re at work, then you can just take it off when your boyfriend is around.”

“This has nothing to do with Rhett, I just don’t need it.”

Magnus rolled his eyes, “You’re a terrible liar Alexander and I’m not here to judge you, just to help you. Doctor-patient confidentiality and all.”

Alec groaned, “Fine whatever.”

“And if you ever need anything, you have my number now, don’t hesitate to call me or text me.”

Alec looked at Magnus in the eyes, he’d never had anyone be so kind and generous towards him, never mind a complete stranger, he didn’t get it. Why him? He was just the barista at his local café. “Why are you doing this?”

“Doing what?”

“Being so nice to me.”

Magnus shrugged flippantly, “Because you make the best unsweetened green iced tea in the whole of New York City.”

Alec laughed to himself, “Well I’m not sure that’s true but thanks for the compliment.”

“Oh it is, and anyway I wanted to make a proposition to you.”

Alec frowned, whatever was coming up next sounded ominous, “A proposition?”

“We need volunteers, volunteers that can sing, like you. We usually have someone go around to sing to the kids on the wards to cheer them up but the girl who used to do it just left for college so we’re recruiting.”

“Magnus, I can’t do that.”

“Why not? I’ve heard you sing in that café and I bet you play guitar or something, the kids would love it, honestly, it makes their day.”

“I haven’t sung in front of anyone for years, not since,” he stopped himself.

“Since?”

“Nothing. I just, I don’t know if I can and Rhett won’t want me to do it, it’s going to cause way too much trouble.”

Magnus nodded as if he understood, which he kind of did, although the other half of him really just wanted to go beat Rhett up so that Alec would finally be free. “Well, at least think about it.”

“I will,” Alec said, he couldn’t deny it to himself that it would be nice to have something to do outside of the housework and the café. 

* * *

The morning went by like every morning did when Alec wasn’t working, he went back home, cleaned the house, went to the park, walked around for a bit, questioned how his life had ended up so fucked then headed to the café. It was boring, and it messed with his head, Izzy thought a morning off would be a good thing for Alec but in reality, it only gave him more time to think and he was sick to hell of thinking it was all he ever did. Which was why he was grateful for the clock to hit 1pm because it meant that he could finally get back into work, it was just making drinks and the occasional sandwich, but it kept him busy and that was what he needed.

“How was it this morning?” Alec asked Izzy as he tied his apron around his waist and turned up the radio slightly.

“Quiet, I see you went to the Doctors.”

Alec nodded, “Rhett just can’t see.”

“He’s such a dickhead,” Izzy said exasperated, “Pass me the chicken from the fridge will you?”

Alec took out the packet from the fridge and handed it to her, “Have tips been good today?”

“I wish, I’ve got about $3”

“We need to get better jobs.”

“At least we have a job.”

“Well, that’s true.”

The door opened as a customer approached the counter and paid for a black coffee, one of the cheapest things on the menu, no tip. Alec sighed to himself, even if he did try and leave Rhett he’d never be able to afford it as much as he hated to admit it, Rhett was the earner of their relationship, he paid more rent then Alec did just so that they could live together. He remembered when Rhett suggested it, he’d planned a date for them at one of Alec’s favourite restaurants and ended it by giving Alec a housekey, asking him to move in with him. It was sweet back then, he’d been so generous and wasn’t fussed that he was paying more, he still never directly complained about it either. He just took Alec’s wages which was only fair considering. That’s what Alec told himself anyway.

“Have you heard from Jace recently?” Alec said as he wiped down the counter.

Izzy turned to look at her brother, “He keeps on posting really soppy pictures of him and Clary on Instagram, it’s gross.”

Alec laughed slightly, “Have you spoke to him though?”

“No, he’s always ‘too busy’ or it’s not a ‘good time’, why are you so interested all of a sudden?”

Alec shrugged, “I didn’t think he’d stay away this long. I miss hanging out you know, me and Rhett, you and Simon, Jace and Clary… it was so good back then.”

“Wow, you really want to hit me with all that nostalgia don’t you?”

“I just wish he hadn’t fucked off like that, it was a dick move.”

“We were grieving Alec, we still are.”

“I know and that’s fine, but it’s been 5 years.”

Izzy put her hand on Alec’s shoulder, “He might come back for Christmas, he’s got a life for himself now though, a good job, better than us two, he has a whole other family in LA. It’s not up to us to take that away from him.” She smiled at her brother cheesily, “Anyway, you can’t complain you’ve got the best sister ever as your colleague!”

“Your modesty really blows me away Izzy, honestly it’s admirable.”

Izzy stuck out her tongue playfully, “Jealousy doesn’t look good on you big bro.”

“Oh is that what it is?”

“Very funny, now come on, we need to restock the cakes.”

* * *

“We’re out of milk!” Izzy shouted from the small kitchen which was located just behind the counter. She smiled to herself as she looked at the time, it was 5:25 and she knew Alec’s favourite customer was about to arrive. Whilst she was happy that Alec clearly fancied someone other than Rhett it scared her, Alec wasn’t doing anything wrong by talking to Magnus, it was innocent, but Rhett wouldn’t see it like that. He was protective and if he found out, god knows what it would mean for Alec. Saying that though, Alec was old enough to make his own choices and his life was so shitty that Izzy wasn’t going to be the person to take away one of the few good things he had. “I’m just going to go run get some. I’ll be back in 20!” 

“You can head home after if you want, I don’t mind closing up.”

“I’m sure you don’t,” she said coming out of the kitchen, a grin on her face.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I don’t know,” she paused, “Magnus will be here soon.”

Alec rolled his eyes, “You’re so annoying.”

“As your little sister that’s my job, I’m glad I’m performing well.”

“Go get the milk!” Alec said turning to make sure the coffee machine had enough water in it.

“Oh hi Magnus, good day?” he overheard Izzy say as the door opened.

“Yeah great thank you, what about you?”

“Same old same old. Alec, take Magnus’ order!”

Alec turned back around to be faced with a knowing look from Izzy as she left the café and Magnus walking up to the counter. He smiled at the man in front of him, he couldn’t help himself, he was just so darn handsome.

“Hey,” Alec said, “Same as usual?”

Magnus nodded, “Hold the lemon though.”

Alec punched in the order on the register and took Magnus’ note, “I’ll bring it over,” he said as he handed him the change.

“Keep it, for yourself,” Magnus said emphasising the last word.

“Thanks.”

“Come sit with me?”

“You normally take out on a Saturday.”

Magnus raised his eyebrows at Alec, “stalker much?”

Alec laughed, “You wish. You’re just boring and predictable.”

Magnus laughed before dramatically putting his hand over his heart, “That was a low blow.” The two of them looked at each other intently for a few moments before Magnus cleared his throat, “I have something for you,” he said as he fumbled in his pocket and handed a leaflet to Alec, “Just in case you change your mind about volunteering at the hospital.”

Alec smiled as he quickly scanned the details, “Thank you.” The two of them looked at each other again. “Erm, I should, you know, get back, erm…”

“…To making my drink?”

“Yeah,” Alec said, knowing his face had probably turned bright red. “I’ll bring it over.”

“You already said that.”

“Sorry.”

Magnus laughed, “I’m teasing you.” 

Alec swore to himself under his breath as he started making Magnus’ drink, he needed to calm down, he couldn’t keep on getting flustered around him it was only going to end up with him getting hurt. That was the thing though, he was already hurt and that made it a lot harder for him not to embrace any source of happiness in his life and unfortunately for him, one source of happiness came from his daily interactions with Magnus. He was fucked and he needed to find a way to get rid of his feelings, quickly.


	3. Nothing Ever Changes

Chapter 3: Nothing Ever Changes 

Alec knew something was up as soon as he entered the apartment, it was like he could physically feel the tension in the air which manifested itself as a racing heart and the urge to throw up. He closed the door behind him quietly, any loud noises would only draw attention to him and trigger Rhett to start shouting. He swallowed down the lump in his throat as he walked steadily into the kitchen to be faced with his boyfriend taking a swig from a glass of what Alec assumed was whiskey.

“The coffee table’s chipped,” Rhett said calmly, the type of calm that was laced with cruelty behind it and instantly put Alec on high alert.

“I’ll paint over it.”

Rhett nodded slowly, “You’re such an idiot, how on earth did you manage to chip the table?”

Alec bit his lip nervously, it must have been Izzy when she opened the beer bottle on it but that wasn’t worth mentioning, “Let me make you some dinner. What do you fancy?” he said walking to the fridge.

Alec’s wrist was suddenly caught in Rhett’s hand sending a sharp pain through him, he knew better than to pull away though. “Where’s my kiss?” Rhett asked.

Alec smiled, pretend to be happy, pretend to be happy, pretend you love him, he repeated over and over in his head as he kissed his boyfriend on the lips, “I’m sorry.”

Rhett’s hand slid down to Alec’s back pocket and pulled out his wallet, “Was it a good day?”

Alec shook his head, “It was quiet.”

Rhett counted the money before slamming the wallet down on the counter, “for fuck's sake!”

“I’m sorry,”

“Stop saying you’re sorry, you’re driving me insane!” Rhett’s voice raised.

“I’ll make spaghetti and meatballs, your favourite right?” Alec started busying himself as he started to prepare the meal, ignoring Rhett who was double-checking the wallet for anything he’d missed.

“What’s this?” Rhett asked turning Alec around by the shoulder.

Alec looked at the flyer that was now right in front of his face, “A customer gave it to me. They overheard me singing in the café, thought I might be interested.”

“Are you?” Rhett questioned, crumpling the flyer and placing it in his pocket.

Alec shrugged, then suddenly found some bravery from somewhere, “It would be nice to get into music again, but I know it’s probably not realistic.” He turned back around as he continued to cook.

Rhett watched his boyfriend as his arms stirred around the pasta sauce in the pan, he sighed to himself then reached up and started massaging his shoulders, “Sing for me tonight. It’s been a while.”

Alec had already tensed up at the presence of Rhett’s touch on his skin, this was what he missed, the version of Rhett that was kind, caring, that was interested in the things Alec liked. This was only temporary, and he knew that, but he had to make the most of it because this Rhett was the Rhett that he fell in love with and when it came back pushing it away was just too heartbreaking to consider.

“Sure,” he said quietly, letting Rhett kiss him on the neck.

“I love you more than anything.”

Alec nodded, “I love you too,” he said even though the words didn’t feel how they did when he used to say it to him.

* * *

After dinner the two of them sat down in the living room where Alec made a conscious effort to not draw any attention to the tiny chip on the coffee table, he didn’t want to ruin this moment. He had to savor it if he didn’t savor moments like these he’d have nothing left at all. He adjusted the guitar on his lap and looked across at Rhett, smiling slightly.

“What was that song called, the one you used to sing to me?”

“Wherever You Will Go, by The Calling.”

“Do you still know it?”

Alec nodded his head as he started the gentle plucking of the strings that introduced the song before he started singing. “_So lately, been wondering_,” he looked up at Rhett who was watching him intently, “_Who will be there to take my place_.” He let himself get absorbed in the song, more and more emotion pouring into his music as the guitar became louder and the lyrics intensified, “_Run away with my heart, run away with my hope, run away with my love._” He knew he was about to cry, he hadn’t sung like this in ages, especially not this song, the song that started everything between him and Rhett, “_wherever you will go,_” he finished off, his voice shaky his eyes wet.

“Maybe this volunteering job isn’t a good idea, I don’t want you getting upset. People will think somethings wrong.”

Alec rested the guitar against the sofa and dried his eyes with his sleeve, “It’s just that song, it means a lot to me, to us.”

Rhett nodded in agreement, “I know, but I don’t think you should be getting any ideas that you know, this could be a career or something for you.”

“I’m not, it was just volunteering at a hospital for kids, it’s not a big deal.”

“Yeah, I’m just saying though, you’re okay but you’re not great if you decide to give music another go, well it would be a waste of your time. You wouldn’t make it.”

“Noted,” Alec said curtly.

He regretted it instantly. He knew better than that, to let Rhett’s words get to him, heck even listening to Rhett’s words was a stupid decision because Rhett knew him better than anybody which subsequently meant that he could hurt Alec better than anyone else could. He should have been used to it by now, but the part of him that wanted a different life for himself, that wanted to perform on stages, release music, act, sing, dance, all the things he enjoyed doing as a kid couldn’t help but fight for some kind of justice. That part of him couldn’t help but be frustrated at not only how his boyfriend could crush his dreams in a heartbeat but could also make Alec believe him as well.

“Cut out that tone,” Rhett said, his eyes glassy with anger, annoyance, something that Alec didn’t want to come face to face with but had already found himself sat next too.

“I’m sorry,” the eyes remained cold, “I’m so sorry Rhett, you’re right, I should listen to you…”

“…You sound pathetic, grow some balls for a change, say how you really feel Alec!” Rhett’s voice got louder as he stood up and walked towards Alec’s guitar picking it up in his hands.

“Rhett, please, don’t, you know how much that guitar means,” too late. Another one of Alec’s lifelines destroyed in the hands of his boyfriend as he watched him snap the neck then crush the body beneath his feet.

“Get over yourself Alec, it’s a stupid guitar that you play sloppily.”

“I…”

“Shut up. I’m going out. You better earn more tomorrow or we’re going to be out on the streets.”

As soon as the door closed Alec crumbled, his body hunched over on itself as he rocked himself in a vain attempt to calm down, but he couldn’t calm down. The guitar was all he had left of his parents, they’d given him it for his 20th birthday, less than three months later they were both dead. He’d do anything to have them with him now, to protect him, hold him, let him know that everything was okay, instead he was alone in the dark with no one there to reassure him. Reassurance wouldn’t help anyway though, this was on him, it was his own fault that his guitar had been broken and when you know it’s your own fault it’s hard to make things better. Which was why he continued to cry, to shake, to grieve and to hate himself until he eventually fell asleep feeling empty and full at the same time the way crying like that always makes you feel. He felt like a little boy that had lost his way and his body curled up in fetus position on the sofa would make anyone notice that he needed help, there was just no one there to notice.

* * *

“Come on Alec, crack a smile for me, please!” Izzy pleaded, it was almost the end of the day and Alec had said next to nothing to her since she arrived for the afternoon shift. Simon had been on in the morning and had warned her that Alec was in a bad mood, but this wasn’t just a bad mood, she knew her brother well enough to know that something a lot more serious was going on. Something had happened and she needed to know what, she was constantly scared for her brother’s safety and the fact that he was becoming more and more depressed each day led her to worry even more about him.

She walked over to him with determination and pulled out the earbuds that he’d refused to take out all day. “Earth to Alec. Very concerned sister trying to break through over here.”

“Leave me alone Izzy,” Alec said, wishing he could just run away, he didn’t want to talk about it. Not now, not ever.

“For fuck's sake Alec…”

“…What the hell is going on?”

Alec froze at the sound of Rhett’s voice, this new thing of visiting him when he was at work was really throwing him off. Especially today when he knew that Izzy was on the warpath. “Don’t say a word Iz, please,” Alec whispered before turning to face Rhett, “Hey,” he said plastering a smile on his face as he walked towards him and kissed him on the cheek, ignoring the eyes bearing into the back of his head from Izzy.

Alec hugged Rhett, his head facing the door as it opened and Magnus walked in, “Don’t say anything,” he mouthed if Rhett found out that the customer that gave him the leaflet was a guy then it would make everything so much worse.

“I see how it is,” Rhett said pulling away from Alec, making Alec’s stomach churn more than it already was, which wasn’t an easy feat as he already felt as though he could throw up at any given minute.

“What do you mean? Do you want coffee?”

“This affection is your way of apologising isn’t it?”

Alec swallowed, “No, it’s because I love you,” there were now two sets of eyes bearing holes into his head. He knew they wouldn’t understand, how could they? But he had to do this, he couldn’t deal with Rhett being in a bad mood for another night, even if he did feel as though he was going to crack at any moment.

Rhett smiled, “Hmm, how much have we got today?” Rhett took Alec’s wallet out of his back pocket and counted up the money, “I love you too by the way,” he said kissing Alec back on the cheek. Alec had never been more grateful for a good day in his life.

“Do you want a drink?”

Rhett shook his head, “No, I have to head back.”

Alec nodded, he had no idea where Rhett was heading back too, his work finished at 5 and that was half an hour ago, but he didn’t care he just needed him to leave before his heart literally exploded. He watched cautiously as Rhett left the café making sure he was out of sight before he exhaled slowly, he’d barely breathed through that whole exchange and the release of air was enough to make him want to cry…again. It was a mystery as to how he had any more tears left to cry after last night.

“What the hell was that?” Izzy said sharply.

“Leave it,” Alec croaked, wanting to crawl up into himself.

“I’m not leaving it, this is ridiculous Alec!”

Alec shook his head as he rested his hands on the counter his head hanging over it, “I can’t do this,” he said suddenly before turning and running out of the café. He had no idea where he was going to go but he knew that he had to get out before he broke down.

“Fuck,” Izzy said as the door slammed behind her brother, “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

Magnus looked at the dark-haired girl in front of him then glance over at Alec’s figure running down the street, “I’m gonna go after him.”

Izzy sighed, “Thank you, I would, but it’s just me.”

Magnus nodded at Izzy reassuringly before racing out of the café and following Alec’s distant figure. He knew that Alec wouldn’t want to talk but being alone when you’re feeling whatever it is that Alec’s feeling is never a good idea. Sometimes you just need someone else there with you just to remind you that you’re not actually alone, not if you don’t want to be. Magnus needed to remind Alec of that before he pushed himself away from everyone close around him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy the chapter! Thanks for reading! 
> 
> Amy x


	4. A Walk In The Park

Chapter 4: A Walk In The Park 

Magnus finally caught up to Alec who was sat on a park bench, hunched over, his head in his hands, his whole body shaking from head to toe. He sat down next to him and placed a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it slightly, making Alec aware of his presence.

“You shouldn’t be here,” Alec barely said, his breaths were uneven before he faulted as his head went dizzy, “I’m gonna faint.”

“No you’re not,” Magnus said, moving position so that he was now squatting on the ground in front of Alec his hand on Alec’s knee to maintain his balance, “You need to breathe, try with me.”

“I can’t.”

“Yes you can, come on,” Magnus started counting his breaths until Alec caught on to the rhythm and eventually stopped being so breathless. “Told you that you could.”

“This keeps on happening,” Alec said as Magnus sat back down next to him.

“What does?”

“This feeling in my chest, I can’t breathe, I think I’m going to pass out or die and I don’t know what to do other than just run and cry and it’s really fucking annoying,” Alec’s breaths started to become ragged again as his brain started to spiral.

“Hey,” Magnus tilted Alec’s chin upwards, so he was looking directly at him, “It’s completely normal to have panic attacks like that, especially in your situation…”

“…I don’t have a situation,” Alec said stubbornly, he didn’t need anyone else involved in his life, Izzy was enough, and she was hard enough to deal with.

Magnus sighed, “Do you think I’m stupid?”

“No,” Alec said, almost protective, it was the kind of question that Rhett would ask him except Magnus wasn’t about to start a fight the semantics behind his question were innocent. There was no need for Alec to get defensive, to put his walls up.

“Then don’t lie to me, you act like you’re hiding this well Alexander, but whatever he’s doing to you, it’s getting worse, you’re barely functioning anymore.”

“I’m functioning just fine.”

Magnus ran his hand through his hair in frustration, “No you’re not.” He paused for a second, “Did he hurt you last night?” Alec shook his head in response. “Alec, tell the truth.”

“He didn’t fucking hurt me okay?” he snapped, “Sorry. Shit, I sound like him.”

“You could never sound like him, never, okay?”

Alec nodded and sighed in frustration at himself, “I need to pull myself together.”

“What happened?” Magnus asked, his voice quieter, softer, making sure that he didn’t come across as confrontational

“He just broke my guitar that’s all.”

Magnus nodded his head, hesitant for a second as he didn’t really know how to continue. Alec was a mess and Magnus had watched him become more and more of a mess for months now, subtle things at first, like forgetting to put lemon in his drink or being clumsy. He’d figured that something was going on, it was hard not to when that pained look was always plastered behind Alec’s eyes no matter how much he tried to hide it. It was only when Magnus had witnessed Alec’s relationship with his boyfriend that it had clicked, he just wished he’d clicked sooner, then maybe he could have intervened and got Alec out quicker. Now though, it was normal, and it was obvious that Alec had trapped himself in some kind of justification that what was going on was okay and something that he could live with. From an outside perspective, Magnus wanted to be straight up, to tell him that no one deserved to live like that, that what was going on wasn’t okay, but it wasn’t that simple. It never was.

“You know if you need anything, you can ask right? A place to stay, medical attention, someone to talk to, just message me…”

“…Magnus, please just, you don’t want to get involved in this.”

Magnus shook his head stubbornly, “Well it’s too late for that. I care about you Alexander and I’ve never let the people I care about go it alone.”

“I don’t need you. Okay.”

“Alec,” Magnus protested.

“I’ve been alone my whole life. I don’t need anyone now.”

That was when it clicked for Magnus, he wasn’t sure how, but something inside of him knew that for Alec, Rhett wasn’t just his boyfriend, he was his somebody. Magnus didn’t know exactly what Alec meant by him being alone his whole life, but he did know that things can’t always have been the way they were now. Which meant that Rhett had to have been someone important to him, a support system for Alec in the past, which kind of explained Alec’s reluctance to move on, to break free, because then he really and truly would be alone. At least that would be how he felt, even though all he had to do was open his eyes to see that he did have people that would be there for him, the same people that had been looking out for him the entire time.

“Well if you change your mind,” Magnus said standing up and placing a hand on Alec’s shoulder, “You have my number.”

* * *

It took about an hour after Magnus had left for Alec to pull himself together and pluck up the courage to head back home, he had to wait for his heart to stop beating so fast and for the infinite number of tears that threatened to fall to evaporate. If Rhett saw him upset, or emotional it could go one of two ways, he could tell him to get over it, that he was a baby and needed to grow up, or he could kick-off, ask why, get angry…hurt him. Neither of those options were particularly appealing to Alec which was why he had to force himself to calm down, even if it was risky arriving home slightly later than usual.

“Alec, come to the kitchen,” Rhett said as Alec entered the building. He didn’t seem angry, which of course, was a good thing, but wasn’t something to be taken with ease. Rhett’s moods flipped quickly, and Alec wasn’t going to risk that happening.

“You’re cooking,” Alec stated as he sat himself down on top of the kitchen counter.

Rhett looked at him and smiled, walking over, resting his hands on Alec’s thighs as he leaned in for a kiss, “I wanted to do something nice for you, and you always cook. So here we are.”

“What are we having?”

“Well, I tried to make these omelets from that recipe book Izzy got you for Christmas, but they were kind of a flop…they’re more like scrambled eggs now.”

Alec grinned, “I’m sure they taste delicious.”

“Well,” Rhett laughed, “You know better than anybody that I’m not all that talented in the kitchen, so I wouldn’t get your hopes up.”

“I’m looking forward to it no matter what it tastes like,” Alec said hopping off the counter to give him a kiss, that was how it worked. If Rhett kissed him he had to make sure to kiss him back pretty shortly after to stop him from becoming so insecure. “Do I have time to shower?”

“Sure, then we can cuddle up on the couch and watch a movie after. Sound good?”

“Sounds perfect.”

It was this that messed with Alec’s head so much, Rhett could be the perfect boyfriend when he wanted to be. He was so romantic, he always had been and when he was like this it felt as though everything bad he’d ever done was erased. Like they’d both gone back in time to where things were how they should have been now but had been lost with the pain of time. This was what Alec wanted from Rhett, the kind gestures, to feel loved and when he got it, he never wanted to forget it, it gave him a reason to forget all the bad things instead.

“You know what I fancy watching?” Rhett said as they sat down on the couch after eating their dinner.

“Let me think…” Alec teased, “A Streetcar Named Desire?”

Rhett laughed, “Am I really that predictable?”

“Even I can’t deny the appeal of Marlon Brando.”

“I’ll put it on.”

The two of them sat on the couch in silence as the movie started to play, a movie that they’d both seen hundreds of times but seemed to have a different meaning, a different emotional punch every time Alec watched it. Watching Stanley become more and more aggressive throughout the film felt as though he was watching Rhett throughout their relationship. Alec, on the other hand, was Stella, trying his best to keep his boyfriend happy to prevent anything bad from happening, from Rhett losing his temper. It wasn’t easy to watch, it tarnished the nice evening that they were having together in a way that made it hard for Alec to continue to embrace how sweet Rhett was being.

“Come here,” Rhett said, gesturing for Alec to cuddle up next to him on the couch.

Alec forced a smile as he moved along the couch and lay in front of Rhett, letting Rhett wrap his arms around him. Alec used to like being held like this, it made him feel safe, protected, but now it made him feel trapped like Rhett was holding him like that so he couldn’t escape from him. He hated that it made him feel like that, which was why he tried his best to relax, and he did slightly, but he knew inside him that it wasn’t the same and that maybe things never would be.

“I love you, I always will,” Rhett whispered in Alec’s ear then trailing kisses down his neck gently, like he used to.

“I love you too,” Alec spoke quietly.

“Forever?”

Alec nodded, his throat dry, “Forever,” he croaked, knowing it was a lie because right now he couldn’t even be sure that he loved him, never mind in the future.

“Good,” Rhett said, pulling Alec’s body into a closer hug “I’m sorry about your guitar, I know it meant a lot to you.”

Alec wanted to ask him why he did it then if he knew it was so sentimental, why did he say that it was ‘just a guitar’ if he knew it meant so much to him, but that really would ruin everything. “You had a right to be angry, it’s fine, don’t worry about it.”

Rhett shook his head, “I still shouldn’t have done it. I promise, nothing like that will happen again.”

Alec smiled, “Okay,” he said.

He knew that it would happen again, Rhett’s promises were always empty, but it did put him at ease, relax him for the rest of the night so that he could fall asleep in Rhett’s arms just like he always used to. He knew he was stupid to be so affected by a false promise, to let that infiltrate his mind and make him feel as though there was hope for their relationship, but he needed Rhett. He needed someone in his life to tell him that they loved him, he needed someone to want him and Rhett had always loved him, always wanted him, and when he was nice, kind, soft, loving, Alec couldn’t help but want him too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! 
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed this chapter and are having a great day! 
> 
> Amy x


	5. The Breaking Point

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, 
> 
> This chapter, is a lot more intense than the previous ones and there is heavy mention of domestic violence, so please only read if this is something you feel comfortable. This is something that was difficult to write, I really hope that I've done it justice and if anyone needs to talk about anything you know where I am. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy, 
> 
> Amy x

Chapter 5: The Breaking Point

There’s something that changes inside of you, it changes when you realise that maybe you’re not alone, that there are people out in the real world, practical strangers sometimes that are happy to jump in to save someone they don’t know. It’s not a conscious change but the seed is planted, and that seed grows, it tries to push through the soil that it is buried beneath until eventually after months of trying it breaks through. It can see the light and it has confidence now, to grow into what it was always meant to be. 

That same seed had been planted inside of Alec and it was Magnus that had put it there, Alec wasn’t aware that he had a little bit more faith than he had a few days ago, but he did and that was important. It was important because a person can only take so much negativity and there comes a point where they realise that maybe something better is on offer. Sometimes, this point isn’t an exciting revelation or a moment of happiness and excitement, it can be sad, heartbreaking and the hardest thing someone will have to go through but is always a monumental life-changing moment. That point is what people call the breaking point.

* * *

Alec stood over the stove stirring the risotto that he’d decided to make for Rhett, he felt guilty, he hadn’t exactly done anything wrong by talking to Magnus, but he knew how he felt about Magnus, and that was wrong. So here he was, making a fancy meal for his boyfriend that he was scared to fall out of love with, even if it had already happened. He breathed in slowly as the front door opened and the sound of Rhett throwing his rucksack onto the side table and heading into the kitchen filled the silence of the house.

“It smells good,” Rhett said, he sounded calm.

Alec turned to face him, taking in his appearance, the perfectly messy blonde hair and blue eyes that he’d fallen for instantly, the slight stubble, the broad shoulders, his arms, his hands, fists that grabbed him pulled him. He looked away. “Chicken and pea risotto.”

“What’s the occasion?” Rhett said as he took a seat at the table.

“Does there have to be one?” Alec responded, turning his back to Rhett as he started to plate up. “Do you want bread?” there was silence in response, “Rhett?”

“Who’s Magnus?”

The world seemed to stop moving as the words registered in Alec’s mind, this was bad, this was more than bad, this was the worst thing possible and he knew that there was no way he could get out of it. Rhett had always had a jealous streak and it had only ever gotten worse as their relationship went on, the only boy Alec was allowed to speak to was his brother Jace, or Simon, occasionally. If he found out, which he had, that he had a friend, a male friend, then…well, Alec didn’t want to think about it, but now he didn’t have a choice.

“A customer,” it was a risky answer as he turned so that he was facing Rhett again, he didn’t want his back to him, that was dangerous.

“Bullshit,” Rhett said, the coldness in his voice more prominent than ever as he stood up and walked towards Alec forcing him to push back against the counter, “Last chance.”

Alec swallowed and clenched his fists in an attempt to stop them from shaking. “I guess, I mean, I…”

“…SPIT IT OUT!” Rhett yelled, his own spit showering Alec.

“He’s a regular at the café, we’re friends I guess.”

“Stop lying to me,” Rhett said pushing Alec back against the counter, almost winding him.

Alec bent over to regain his breath, “I’m not,” he said standing up, “Come on, let’s talk about this properly.” He wanted the situation to diffuse, he couldn’t fight anymore.

“Why do you have his address on his phone, you whore, you’re sleeping with him after all I’ve given to you,” Rhett pushed Alec again, making Alec buckle and fall to the floor only for him to be kicked in the ribs.

“Rhett, stop. Listen to me,” he begged, tears threatening to fall, “He’s a doctor, that’s his office, my wrist was hurt,” Alec winced as he reached into his pocket and pulled out the support, “he gave me this.”

“We can’t afford doctors Alec!” he kicked him again, “You selfish bastard, you’re using our fucking money on stupid things like that, who do you think you are.”

“It was free,” Alec croaked as he scrambled the best he could to the kitchen door, pulling himself up onto his feet, “he was just being nice.”

As soon as he started to run he knew it was a bad idea, there was no way he could outrun Rhett, and there was nowhere to run to, other than upstairs, which Alec found himself halfway up before everything went black.

* * *

Alec wasn’t sure how long he was out for, all he did know was that it was light the last time he remembered and now it was dark. He looked around him, he was at the bottom of the stairs and his ankle was twisted in a way that it definitely shouldn’t have been. He groaned as he tried to move almost blacking out again from the pain that was covering his entire body. He reached into his pocket, fumbling around for his phone that wasn’t there, that was why…his phone was on the dining room table…where Rhett was sitting…he must have looked through his phone, saw the messages. It all clicked into place as the urge to vomit rose in his chest.

He tried to move again only to find himself throwing up all over the floor. He knew he looked bad, he knew that this was bad, he’d never been in this much pain before and he was stuck. He also knew he had to get out of here, this was it, he couldn’t face Rhett again, not now, not ever. His body couldn’t take it, not physically or mentally.

It was that determination that somehow allowed him to move from the bottom of the stairs and into the kitchen where he reached up and dragged his phone to the floor. Adrenaline taking over as he swallowed down the urge to vomit again scrolling through his contacts, he waivered over Izzy’s number but decided against it. She was too much, she’d freak out and that wasn’t what he needed, he needed a calming presence which was why he barely hesitated to call Magnus.

“Alexander?” Magnus’ voice questioned from the other side of the phone. It wasn’t like Alec to text him, never mind call him and the ragged breaths from the other side of the line didn’t exactly put Magnus at ease.

“I,” Alec’s voice cracked as he started to cough, splattering blood onto the tiles, “I need you.”

“You’re scaring me, Alec, what’s going on.”

Alec quickly sent Magnus his location, “First-floor window.”

“I’m coming now, don’t worry,” Magnus his heart racing as he listened to Alec coughing, “Alec, you need to stay on the line, talk to me.” He didn’t know what was happening, what had happened, but Alec sounded like he was about to collapse, to give up and it didn’t take a doctors qualification to know that wasn’t a good thing.

“I’m here,” Alec wiped his mouth.

“Is there blood, when you cough?”

Alec nodded, wanting to pass out again, it was so hard not to just pass out.

“Alec, I need you to stay awake for me, I’m in the car now, I’ll be there in 5 minutes.”

“There’s blood,”

“Shit,” Magnus cursed to himself as he drove quickly through the streets, “Okay, I’m nearly with you.”

“I’m going to pass out,”

“No, you’re not. Talk to me Alec, okay, what’s your favourite colour?”

“Black,” Alec said weakly.

“Of course it is, what about your favourite food?”

Alec vomited again, his throat burning from the acid, “Definitely not the turkey sandwich I just threw up.”

Magnus laughed slightly, “Well at least you still have a sense of humour,” he said as he pulled up outside of Alec’s house, “Okay I’m coming in now.”

* * *

It seemed to take forever for Magnus to get from the window to Alec, but that could have been because Alec was drifting in and out of consciousness and that every second seemed to feel like an hour. When he did arrive though, his image was like that of a god as he came into the kitchen, his cheeks flushed, and his eyes etched with concern.

“Fucking hell Alexander,” Magnus said racing towards him, unphased by the pile of vomit and blood on the floor as he knelt down next to him. He cupped his jaw in his hands tilting his head, checking his alertness, “Stay awake, you’re going to be fine. I’m going to call an ambulance.”

“No, Magnus…you can’t…please.”

Magnus bit his lip, “I can’t help you here Alexander, there’s too much and I don’t have the equipment, I, I, there’s nothing else I can do.”

“Please,” Alec said quietly.

Magnus closed his eyes for a second, hoping that some other genius idea would occur to him, but he knew that he had to do it as he called the number, trying to ignore Alec’s protests. “I’ll be with you the whole way, right by your side,” he said sitting cross-legged on the floor and lifting Alec carefully so that he was resting on his thigh.

“I can’t afford it without him,” Alec said.

“I’ll pull some strings.”

Magnus placed his hand on Alec’s forehead which was clammy with sweat, he brushed back his hair with his hands, so it was off his face, trying to make him as comfortable as possible. “Can you tell me where exactly you’re hurting. It’ll make it easier for the paramedics if they know now.”

“My ankle, my chest, ribs, wrist, everything,” he started coughing again.

Magnus tilted his head so that he wouldn’t choke, “What happened?”

“I don’t remember everything.”

“Tell me what you do remember?”

A tear started to roll down Alec’s cheek, “He pushed me and then I fell, he kicked me a few times then, then I ran up the stairs…I don’t remember anything after that, but when I woke up I was at the bottom of them.” Tears were streaming now, like the memory of what happened was being relived as Alec explained it.

“You’re safe now,” Magnus said resting his chin on Alec’s head and rocking him slightly, “I won’t let him hurt you again.”

Alec didn’t know why he admitted it, but he was the most vulnerable he’d ever been as he looked up into Magnus’ eyes, “I’m scared,” he said as the doors burst open at the arrival of the paramedics.

“I’m here, always,” Magnus said before he started explaining Alec’s injuries to the paramedics. The vacant room that had felt empty when it was just the two of them was now lit up from the ambulance’s lights, the sound of sirens outside, doctors, paramedics bustling around Alec. They were in safe hands now, it was just the future that they had to deal with.


	6. The World Is Your Oyster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! 
> 
> Hope you are all enjoying so far! 
> 
> Thank you for reading, 
> 
> Amy x

Chapter 6: The World Is Your Oyster 

Magnus held Alec’s hand all the way in the ambulance and was reluctant to let go when they took him away for surgery, he didn’t want to let go because he knew that if Alec woke up then he would be scared. Magnus’ doctors office had been enough to almost send Alec into a panic attack, if he woke up now, in an actual hospital then it was obviously going to warrant him freaking out even more. So, as soon as Alec was out of surgery Magnus picked up his hand, sandwiching it between his own so at least when he did wake up, he wouldn’t feel so alone.

“Have you heard from Rhett?” Magnus asked Izzy who was sat on the opposite side of the bed to him.

“No,” Izzy said glancing at her watch, “It’s only 10am though, if he went out drinking last night then he won’t have woken up yet.”

Magnus nodded, “Well, if he wakes up soon I can take him back to mine, I have a spare bed and Rhett won’t be able to find him there.”

“I know I’ve never really spoken to you properly Magnus, but I’m so glad Alec has you, he’s been trapped in this world of just him and Rhett for so long, I don’t think he realised that there could be something else outside of that.”

“Well, I’m here for him. We can’t have anything bad happening to the best iced tea maker in the entirety of New York City can we?”

Izzy laughed, “I feel like I should be offended but I’m going to let it slide.”

Both of them turned their heads as they noticed Alec stirring slightly, his hand gripping onto Magnus’ and a sense of relief washing over them both.

“Hey big bro,” Izzy said softly reaching up towards his face and brushing his hair back, “How you feeling?”

Alec squinted in response, his eyes getting used to the light and his head still groggy from medication, “Everything hurts,” he croaked still not fully awake. Magnus watched him carefully, noticing how Alec’s eyes shifted from being unfocused to suddenly darting around the room, “Shit,” he said attempting to sit up, “Where’s Rhett? We have to get out of here!”

Magnus reached out to Alec’s shoulder, gently pushing him back down so he was lying on the bed, “Don’t worry about Rhett, he’s not going to come here, and in a couple of hours we’ll get you out and you can stay at mine. He won’t find you there.”

Alec looked at Magnus perplexed, “No. No, I can’t do that to you, it’s not your job to deal with my shit, this isn’t right.”

Izzy sighed, “For fucks sake Alec, just let yourself be helped for once, Rhett almost killed you last night, one more kick, one more punch and you could have been dead. So shut up with the ‘I don’t need anyone’ attitude and get a grip.”

Alec glared at Izzy before looking back at Magnus who shrugged flippantly, “She’s not wrong.”

Alec sighed in frustration, he wanted to cry, to breakdown, so much had happened in the last 24 hours and everything had been flipped on it’s head. Rhett had been his safety despite being the person that put him in danger every day and losing that, well it was complicated to say the least. That paired with the added guilt that came with staying at Magnus’ well it was scary, because if Rhett did find out where he was staying then what he would do was unpredictable, and it meant that Magnus could be at risk. Which really didn’t seem fair, but apparently he didn’t have a choice in the matter, and if he was honest with himself he kind of new that he didn’t either. If he went to stay at Izzy’s Rhett would find them straight away, this was the only safe option, other than moving to California with Jace which wasn’t exactly feasible.

“WHERE THE FUCK IS HE?” The doors to the room where Alec was in swung up aggressively, “I’ll fucking kill that motherfucker. Izzy, where the fuck is he the little shit…Alec, fuck, bro, you look a mess.”

Alec smiled at the presence of his brother, almost bringing him to tears, he hadn’t seen him in years and he certainly wasn’t expecting him to fly from California to New York on such short notice, “Thanks,” Alec said sarcastically, “Come on, give me a hug, it’s been years.”

Jace grinned and headed over to the side of the bed wrapping his arms around Alec who reciprocated the hug back despite the amount of pain it added to his body. “I’ve missed you,” Jace said.

“I’ve missed you too.”

“And I’ve missed you too,” Izzy imputed, “But we need to come up with a plan.”

“I’ll kill him, there we go, Bob’s your uncle, Fanny’s your aunt.”

Izzy rolled her eyes at her brother, “We need to come up with a plan that doesn’t involve killing anyone. You have Clary to think about, remember?”

“I wasn’t actually going to kill him.”

“Well I bloody hope not.”

Magnus looked across at Alec, noticing the heart rate monitor increase slightly as he listened to his siblings discuss what the best thing to do was. “Hey,” he said picking up Alec’s hand again, “You okay?”

Alec shook his head, biting his lips to hold back the tears, “I’m not ready, they’re going to want me to report him, I can’t…”

Magnus looked back up at the monitor then smiled back down at Alec reassuringly squeezing his hand tight, “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. Let’s just get you out of here, get you better.”

“Are you sure they’re going to discharge me? My leg’s broken right?”

“It is,”

“And my wrist, so I can’t use crutches.”

“They’ll give you a wheelchair and we’ve already told them that you’re living with me, I can deliver any medical care from home.”

“Magnus, you have a job, a life…”

“…Shush. I’ve been wanting to take some time off for a while.”

“It’s not time off if you’re looking after me. Don’t take it, I’ll stay at yours, but I can look after myself.”

“No offense, but you’ve said that to me before and look where that got us. Honestly, Alexander, I wouldn’t help you if I didn’t want to, so just leave it at that.”

Alec sighed, “Thank you,”

“It’s my pleasure. I’m going to go speak to the nurse about getting you discharged.”

* * *

Alec couldn’t help but feel nervous about staying with Magnus. Magnus was someone who had his life together, he had a good job, a really good job, a two-bed apartment, the ability to take time off from work because he was supposed to get time off. It was completely different to Alec who had nowhere to live and wasn’t even sure if he’d have a job when he was finally recovered enough to go back.

“So, the elevator is broken,” Magnus said after pressing the button about 100 times.

“What floor are you on?”

“7th. I guess I could carry you, is that okay?”

Alec swallowed, “Erm yeah, I don’t think we have much else of a choice.”

“Well that’s true.” Magnus shifted between his feet nervously, “I think this is going to hurt, your ribs are bruised so me lifting you might…”

“…I can take it.”

The walk up the stairs to the seventh floor was long, probably because Alec was taller than Magnus which meant that it wasn’t all that easy to carry him anyone, never mind the added injuries and the fact that they were climbing seven flights of stairs.

“Oh my god,” Magnus said, breathless as he placed Alec down on the bed, “I need to get back to the gym.”

Alec laughed at the statement, “I’m very impressed.”

“Did I hurt you?”

“No more than I already am.”

“Okay, good,” he paused, “Not good that you’re already hurt, good that I didn’t hurt you more.”

Alec nodded, “Yeah, I’ve got it.”

“Right. Do you want coffee, tea, water?” Magnus said, suddenly realising that he never usually had houseguests and wasn’t too sure how to act.

“Coffee would be nice.”

“Shit, wait, I’m a doctor.”

Alec looked at Magnus confused, “Did you forget? Maybe I’m the one that should be looking after you,” he teased.

“No, well, yeah. I got myself wrapped up in the whole ‘welcome to your new home’ patter that I forgot I’m supposed to getting you better. Which means no coffee, not yet, it’s not the best thing to digest and you threw up a lot last night, you also had internal bleeding, basically, we just need to stick to simple foods.”

“No coffee?”

“No coffee.”

“I think I’m going to be going through withdrawal as well as recovering from these injuries.”

Magnus laughed, “I’m sure you’ll be fine. Make yourself as comfortable as possible, I’ll go get you a glass of water.”

* * *

It was weird for both Alec and Magnus, for both of them their living situations had completely changed. Alec had gone from living with someone that put him on edge 24/7 to living with someone who genuinely wanted to care for him, to make sure that he was okay, and Magnus had gone from living alone to living with someone who was broken in so many ways but who was trying their best to not make the situation weird. It was a good mix though, the two of them had hit it off since the first day Magnus visited the café simply because he fancied a change and since then they’d become good friends, even if it was just casual small talk over the counter. Neither of them realised that even when you’re not talking about anything in particular and you’re only seeing each other for 5 minutes of the day that you can become so close to someone. They cared about each other, they were familiar to each other and that was all they really needed for their friendship to blossom even in the direst of circumstances.

“Have you been watching anything on Netflix recently? We could watch something together, we need to do something to fill in our evenings,” Magnus asked. He was sat on the other side of the bed Alec was in flicking through the tv on the wall.

“Rhett never let me…fuck, I’m sorry. We shouldn’t talk about him.”

Magnus watched Alec as his expression changed from fairly neutral to something a bit darker, his eyebrows slightly furrowed like he was trying to justify something in his mind, “Maybe we should, he was a big part of your life.”

“Sometimes, I feel like I have to question if what me and Rhett had was ever any good, I know it was, in the beginning he was my world, but now whenever I think of him, the first thing that comes to mind is the pain he’s caused. Or, like, this suspense in my stomach about whatever he’s going to do next.”

Magnus nodded, “Tell me what it used to be like, before he changed. How did you meet?”

Alec smiled to himself slightly, he remembered that night like it was yesterday, he’d never forget it either. “I was busking on the streets, completely in my own world until I noticed him, he was sat on a bench and he was there for ages, over an hour. Anyway, when I was packing up my stuff he came up to me and threw a few dollars in my guitar case. Back home, I counted up my money and came across a note, it was from Rhett, it had his number on and told me to meet him the next night at this restaurant across town. I did and the rest was history.”

“That’s incredibly romantic.”

“Back then Rhett was a massive fan of the ‘romantic gesture’, it was sweet, he was sweet.” Alec cleared his throat, “When my parents died, he was all I had, Izzy was grieving in her own way, Jace went off to California with his wife Clary. If I hadn’t of had Rhett, I… I guess I don’t know if I’d have survived it.”

“How long ago was that?”

“About 5 years, it wasn’t long after we met.”

“I’m sorry about your parents Alexander, it must have been hard to lose them at that point in your life when everything’s changing.”

Alec wiped away a tear, “It was.” He sighed, “Anyway, enough about my depressing as fuck life. What about you, what’s your story?”

Magnus pushed himself back into the bed to get comfy, “I never knew my mother, not really, the version of her I did know wasn’t really her either, it’s complicated. Anyway, my father raised me, he’s kind of a dickhead, kind of not, he wasn’t a big fan of ‘school’ said it was a waste of time, we clashed quite a bit. When I was 16, I moved out, got a part time job, worked my ass off at school then got into medical school and here we are. Pretty boring to be honest.”

“I don’t know about that. It’s impressive you worked and got good enough grades for medical school at the same time. I spent my last two years of high school dreaming that I could be a performer before I realised that I was just fantasising.”

“Don’t knock yourself, you could still be a performer. Your voice is incredible, hey, you could start busking again, or upload YouTube videos or something like that.”

Alec grinned, “Maybe, although I don’t know if I’m quite in the right state to do that.”

“The world is your oyster now Alexander, you can be whoever you want to be.”

“So wise,” Alec teased.

“I do try. Okay, I’m going to put ‘Glee’ on, maybe that will inspire you.”

The two of them sat in silence as the tv started playing, watching episode after episode until they both ended up drifting off to sleep. For the first time in what seemed like forever, Alec felt safe with Magnus right beside him. Rhett didn’t know where he was, he didn’t ever have to know where he was and yes that hurt a bit, to know that what they’d had for so long was officially over, but it was important to, because now the world really was his oyster.


	7. Safe

Chapter 7: Safe

“Good morning!”

Alec groaned as Magnus opened the curtains filling the room with unwanted sunlight that seemed to be burning his eyes. “Morning,” Alec grumbled as he rubbed the sleep away with his working arm.

“How did you sleep?” Magnus asked.

“I woke up a lot, whenever I moved something hurt.”

Alec opened his eyes fully and looked over at Magnus, not expecting to see him shirtless but also not complaining as his abs looked as though they’d been carved by God himself. “I’ll leave some painkillers on the bedside table tonight then, you can take them if you wake up in pain.”

“Thanks,” Alec said trying to push himself up on the sheet only to find Magnus right by his side adjusting his pillows for him.

“Okay?”

“Yeah.”

Magnus headed over to the tray that had several bottles of medicine on it that he’d been keeping on top of the chest of drawers and started sorting them out. “Okay, first medicine of the day,” he said handing the pills to Alec.

“What are these even for?” Alec said, taking them anyway.

“Painkillers, antibiotics and I’ve added some vitamins to the mix because I doubt you’re going to want to eat properly for a while. Especially with the antibiotics you’re on, they do the job, but they’re kind of renowned for making people throw up.”

“Great,” Alec said, the last thing he wanted was to be adding throw up onto the list of things wrong with him.

“So, I also need to redress the cut on your stomach, but I promise it’s my last doctor role for at least 3 hours.”

“There’s a cut on my stomach?” Alec asked, he’d barely even taken the time to consider what injuries he actually had, apart from the obvious ones, he just felt as though everything hurt.

Magnus nodded, “It’s quite bruised, but he kicked you pretty hard, so it’s broken the skin in places.”

Alec nodded, “He really fucked me up didn’t he?”

“Izzy wasn’t exaggerating when she said he almost killed you Alexander, I was so scared when I found you, I honestly didn’t know if you’d make it.”

Alec looked away from Magnus in shame, “I’m sorry,” he said, and he was, he hadn’t meant to put his life in so much danger and it couldn’t have been easy on Magnus finding him like that. If he’d opened his eyes sooner then maybe things would have been different, but at the same time he knew why he hadn’t opened his eyes and he wasn’t sure that even if he’d known the future that things would have changed.

“You have nothing to be sorry for. I’m just glad you called, if you hadn’t, well fuck knows what would have happened.” Magnus smiled at Alec, “And you’re here now, that’s what matters. Can you lift your shirt up for me?”

Alec nodded before he started grinning at Magnus, “any excuse to see me shirtless?”

Magnus laughed, “I’m not gonna lie, this informality is definitely an added bonus,” he said as he started to take off the bandage, “this might sting a little.”

He wasn’t wrong, the peeling away of the old dressing followed by the sharp sting of an antiseptic solution definitely stung a bit but Alec wasn’t one to complain. If anything he appreciated the gentle nature of Magnus’ hands as he tried to minimize as much pain as possible, hands that had become accustomed to healing so many other people as well. It was comforting and a stark contrast to the rough nature of Rhett that he was so used to.

“Thank you,” Alec said once Magnus was done, “what are your plans for the day?” he continued. It was Magnus’ time off work he hardly expected him to hang around when he could be off having fun.

“What do you mean?”

“How are you spending your first day off from work?”

Magnus shrugged, “I was just going to hang here with you,” he said, a slightly perplexed expression on his face.

“I’m sure you have better things to do than hang with me, I’ll be fine, you should go out an enjoy yourself.”

“Contrary to your belief, I do actually enjoy hanging out with you Alexander,” Magnus said, “Although if you’re that desperate to get rid of me I can go walk around the park on my own.”

“No,” Alec laughed, “I just… I don’t want you feeling like you’re trapped here. You’re already doing so much I don’t want to take away from your free time.”

Magnus shook his head stubbornly, “I’m a big boy, I can choose to spend my time how I want can’t I?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“Then you have nothing to worry about.”

There was a knock at the door. Alec didn’t want to freak out, but he also couldn’t help but feel as though he was spiraling as he pictured the possibility of Rhett standing on the other side of it.

“Hey,” Magnus said putting a hand on Alec’s shoulder, “It’s Izzy, she said she’d come around to see how you were remember?”

Alec breathed a sigh of relief, “Shit, yeah, of course.”

“You good?”

“I’m good.”

“I’ll go let her in.”

* * *

“Is it going to hurt if I give you a hug?” Izzy asked as she entered the bedroom with Magnus following behind her.

“Probably, but I’ll allow it,” Alec said as he let his sister wrap her arms around him, “Where’s Jace?”

“He’s gone to get you some clothes.”

“From the house?”

Izzy shook her head, “No, I don’t think we’re going to be able to get in there for a few days,” she paused for a moment, checking in on her brother, “Rhett came over to mine and Simon’s yesterday evening…”

“…How was he?”

“Angry, as expected. He was asking after you, getting himself het up. Thankfully Jace was there, he scared him off. Jace has been looking in on your place this morning and it’s as though Rhett is guarding it, waiting for you to come home.”

“Fuck,” Alec said running his hand through his hair. Debating whether all of this was worth it, if Rhett got angry at his sister, he’d never forgive himself.

“Alec, stop it.”

“Stop what?”

“You’re not going back there.”

“I never said I was.”

“You were thinking it,” Izzy watched as her brother relaxed his defensive, “Anyway, he’s going to have to leave to go to work eventually. We can go and get your stuff then.”

“Then I just need to find somewhere to live and somewhere to work where he won’t find me…” Alec lingered on the sentence, the statement sounded impossible coming from his lips.

“You can stay here as long as you need to Alexander. A month, two months, a year, whatever it takes.”

“I couldn’t be a burden on you like that.”

“Once you get better, get back to work, you can pay rent if that makes you feel better.”

“What the fuck am I going to do about work?” Alec sighed as he said it, already feeling panic rise in his throat, “He’ll find me.”

Izzy cleared her throat awkwardly, knowing that what she was about to say would upset Alec. “You could report him. Then he’d be locked away, he couldn’t get to you anymore.”

Alec looked between Izzy and Magnus, fear etched on his face, “there’s no way, I just, shit, I…”

“…Okay.” Magnus interrupted, “That’s enough for now, you need to rest Alexander.”

“There’s no pressure to do anything Alec, just, think about it,” Izzy said, kissing her brother lightly on the forehead. “I’ll support you whatever you decide to do.”

“As will I, but you do really need to rest up,” Magnus said ushering Izzy out of the room. “Do you want coffee? If you’re anything like your brother then I’m assuming you could do with some.”

“Yeah please,” Izzy said as she sat down at the island counter in Magnus’ kitchen.

Magnus busied himself as he turned on the machine and started grabbed some mugs from the cupboard, “Have you had breakfast?”

“Yeah,” Izzy said nonchalantly.

Magnus turned to look at her before sliding the now full mug of coffee across to her, “He will be okay you know. He just needs his time.”

Izzy nodded, “I know he will. I wish I could just erase all the shit that’s happened these past years, make things easier for him.”

“Trust me, I’d do the same if it were possible, but, it isn’t and all we can do now is listen to him, trust him, support him and be available. He’ll figure out what to do soon enough.”

“I’m worried he’ll push us all away, that’s what he usually does.”

“I won’t let him,” Magnus said, “Izzy,” he squeezed her arm, “Everything will be okay.”

The two of them sat and drank their coffee in silence for a few minutes before Izzy’s phone buzzed with a text from Jace saying that he was outside.

“Hey,” Jace said as Izzy opened the door, going in for a hug, “Hi Magnus,” he said nodding his head in the direction of the man that he barely knew yet was still offering Alec a lifeline.

“Did you manage to get some stuff for him?” Izzy asked sitting back down at the island.

“Yeah, just some sweats and a few t-shirts, toothbrush, toothpaste, that kind of thing.” He smiled at Magnus as he handed him a cup of coffee, “How is he?” he asked glancing over at the closed door.

“He’s sleeping,” Magnus said, “A couple of days of complete rest and he should be able to move around a bit, his leg will take a bit longer to heal but we can get him up and running on crutches.”

“How about, like, mentally?” Jace asked, he wasn’t one to discuss emotions and things like that in detail, but with Alec and what had happened to him it had changed his perspective. He’d been to hell and back and he wanted to make sure he was doing okay inside his head not just on the outside.

Izzy sighed, “That’s what I’m worried about. He seems more focused on his physical injuries right now, but you know what Alec’s like, he’ll push away anything that’s going on in his head.”

“We have to keep him talking,” Jace inputted.

“He needs to trust us though, we can’t push him into talking about things he doesn’t want to, he needs to know that we’re here for him but if we force him to talk, to do things he’s not ready to do. Then we’ll be the ones that push him away.”

Izzy nodded her head in agreement, “We just have to keep a close eye on him.”

Jace took a sip from his coffee before directing his attention to Magnus, “How did you meet Alec again? This past 24 hours has been so crazy I can’t remember if I asked or not.”

“You didn’t, don’t worry. I go to the café Alec and Izzy work at every day after my shift has finished.”

“5:30 without fail,” Izzy interrupted.

“I’m very predictable,” Magnus joked, “Anyway, Alec is always there, he’s made my drink for me pretty much every day for 6 months. We got talking as you do when you become a regular anywhere and that’s pretty much it. We’ve never been friends outside of the café, but he’s always been so nice to me and, I don’t know, I just found myself caring more and more about him as the weeks went on. Strange really.”

“Do you fancy him?”

“Jace!” Izzy exclaimed, neither of them even knew Magnus’ sexuality so the question was presumptuous to say the least.

Magnus chuckled, “I’m not going to deny that your brother is incredibly attractive and couldn’t be more my type. However, that has nothing to do with why I’m helping him I just want him to be okay, to be safe.”

Izzy smiled, “You know, if anything ever did happen between the two of you. I would back it all the way, you’re good for each other.”

“I don’t know you that well Magnus, and even I agree.”

“It’s going to take time for Alexander to trust anyone again…”

“If he starts to trust you in that way though, let him. He needs to learn how to love again.”

Magnus nodded, “I know.”

Jace scoffed to himself earning himself another glare from Izzy, “Whilst I agree with all this, it is incredibly cheesy.”

Magnus laughed, “Well, you’re not wrong there.”

Suddenly there was the sound of throwing up coming from Alec’s bedroom, “Shit, what’s happening?” Izzy said jumping off the stool and heading to the door.

“It’s the antibiotics he’s on, nothing to worry about,” Magnus said as he followed Izzy to Alec’s room.

“You sure?”

“I am a doctor.”

Izzy nodded, “I’ll clean it up, you’re giving him enough of your time, cleaning up his vomit isn’t something you should have to do.”

Magnus grinned, “I mean I clean up vomit most days, but if you’re offering I’m not going to deny the request.”

Magnus sat back down at the counter with Jace as Izzy helped Alec. It was a nice feeling, to be so supported by a group of strangers, it was as though they were the avengers, teaming up together to beat Thanos, except Thanos was Rhett, and Alec was the infinity stones. They were united, a team and that would make things so much easier for Alec.


	8. Weakness Can Become Strength

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, 
> 
> Hope you are all still enjoying this! I'm very busy with uni and stuff atm so feel like I haven't had much of a chance to reply to all of your comments, I have read them though and I appreciate it so much! Thank you for reading! 
> 
> Amy x

Chapter 8: Weakness Can Become Strength

Living with Magnus had worked well for Alec that first week. He was too injured to move much and the physical pain in his body occupied his thoughts more than anything else did. That paired with Magnus’ expert care and ability to tell when Alec needed anything, despite Alec not telling him that he did because he didn’t want to bother him, had meant that Alec had almost managed to get over his embarrassment at having to be looked after by him.

A week on though and Alec’s injuries were getting a little better, his ribs didn’t hurt as much when he moved, his wrist just had a support on it, and he was finally off the antibiotics. The only injuries that were still a problem was the broken leg and the external bruising and cuts on his stomach that Magnus changed the dressings on daily. It was fine though, because at least Alec felt as though some of his independence back, until the nightmares that turned into panic attacks that resulted in him crying almost every night began.

“I’m gonna turn in for the night,” Magnus said, getting up from the sofa, “Are you ready for bed?”

“I suppose,” Alec said, not wanting to admit that the past few nights he’d been too scared to fall asleep, just in case the nightmares happened, which they inevitably would.

“Let me help you,” Magnus said, guiding Alec onto his feet and handing him the crutches, walking behind him and watching him as he took his shirt off and slid into bed not all that gracefully. “Are you comfortable?”

Alec nodded, “Thanks Magnus.”

Magnus smiled, he wanted to mention the nightmares, to remind him that it was okay, if they happened, it was normal, but at the end of the day it didn’t stop them. The only way forward, other than Alec going to a therapist, which he definitely would not want to do, not yet, was to be there when they happened. To be the magnet that pulled him back to reality.

_It was dark in the bedroom, but the light from the kitchen outside crept through the cracks in the door that stopped the room from being too suffocating. There was a creak from the door which Alec watched as it slowly opened in front of him revealing a tall silhouette and expressing the scent of stale whiskey into the room, infiltrating his nostrils making him want to scream. Now he really was suffocating. _

_He pushed his body against the back of the bed, wanting it to swallow him up, take him away from the situation, but he couldn’t move, he couldn’t run, and he couldn’t scream, not yet. _

_The figure moved towards him, it’s features becoming more recognisable as the man he once loved, the man that destroyed him. Rhett was beside the bed, his eyes cold, empty, callous, as they always were, as his breath tickled Alec’s neck. _

_“You’re nothing more than a child, weak, vulnerable, pathetic.” _

_Alec tried to speak, but nothing came out, whether it was because of fear or insight that speaking only made things worse, he didn’t know. What he didn’t know was what to do next, there was nowhere to escape to, he was here, trapped with his boy- no, his ex-boyfriend towering over him. _

_“You deserve this, y- you’re repulsive.” _

_The last word showered him in saliva as Rhett reached towards him, his hand grasping around Alec’s neck, taking away his oxygen, not letting him breathe, not letting him scream until finally, he let something out, a yell, followed by a waterfall of tears, frustration and… _

“Alexander, wake up, it’s just a nightmare, you’re fine, you’re safe, I’m right here,” Magnus pleaded, his hand gently on Alec’s shoulder.

Alec’s eyes opened suddenly as he breathed in sharply like he was trying to inhale as much oxygen as possible before his body almost collapsed in on itself, as he started to shake. Magnus pulled Alec towards him, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him towards him, holding him until he finally stopped shaking.

“I’m sorry,” Alec croaked, “You didn’t sign up for this,” he said pulling himself away from Magnus.

“Yes I did,” Magnus said, wiping the tears from underneath Alec’s eyes with his thumbs, holding his head in his hands.

Alec looked past Magnus, noticing the make-shift bed that had been set up on the floor, “Shit Magnus. You don’t need to sleep in here, I’m fine.”

“Alec, you weren’t breathing. I had to wake you up to remind you to breathe.”

“No, I, I wasn’t deliberately…”

“Alexander,” Magnus’ voice was soft, “I know you weren’t, but I’d rather be here, just in case,” he sighed, “I don’t know.”

“It’s not fair, if you’re going to insist, you should at least have the bed, I’ll sleep on the floor,” Alec said trying to stand up.

Magnus manoeuvred him back down onto the bed, “Don’t be silly. You can’t sleep on the floor in your condition.”

“I’m almost better, it’s fine.”

“That legs still going to take a few weeks and sleeping on the floor isn’t going to speed up that process.”

Alec hesitated for a second before he continued, “You could always share with me, I mean, this beds massive, we could have a side each or something.”

Magnus smiled, “Alexander, I wouldn’t want to intrude on your space.”

“You wouldn’t be. We can even make a pillow barrier if you want.”

“I don’t know…”

Alec knew what Magnus was worried about, that Alec sharing a bed with a man other than Rhett could upset him, that it was too big of a step, even if there were no romantic attachments. But Alec knew in himself that he didn’t mind, that he could deal with it, him and Rhett hadn’t been sexually involved for almost a year anyway, that had fizzled out as soon as things started to go downhill. “Magnus, It’s fine.”

“Are you sure you’re ready…”

“…I wouldn’t have asked otherwise.”

Magnus nodded, “If you want me to move, let me know.”

“I will.”

Magnus got up and walked around to the other side of the bed, stacking pillows down the middle of it before pulling back the sheets and getting into bed, turning so he was facing Alec. “You’re sure this isn’t weird?”

Alec nodded, “It’s kind of comforting. Having you there, I don’t know how to explain it.”

“Well, that’s a good thing I guess.”

“Yeah,”

Magnus smiled, “Goodnight Alexander.”

“Goodnight Magnus.”

* * *

“Do you want to go for a walk?” Magnus asked. It was the next morning and both of them had been stuck in Magnus’ apartment for what seemed like forever.

“I mean, that’s not exactly my forte right now.”

“We’ll take the chair, I feel as though you could do with some fresh air.”

Alec nodded before he hesitated for a second, “What if Rhett sees us?”

“New York is a big city, with lots of parks, the chance of him bumping into us is slim, and if he does I’m pretty sure I can make a good bodyguard.”

“I don’t know Magnus, this might not be a good idea.”

“I’m not going to force you to do anything Alexander, but eventually you’re going to have to take the step, you can’t stay inside forever.”

Alec sighed, “just for half an hour?”

“We can leave whenever you want.”

The park wasn’t as stressful as Alec anticipated it to be, yes he spent the first 10 minutes constantly looking around for any signs of Rhett but after a while he relaxed. Magnus had been right, getting some fresh air had done him the world of good and being back in civilisation was kind of healing.

“Thanks for this,” Alec said looking over his shoulder at Magnus who was pushing him in the wheelchair.

“My pleasure,” Magnus replied as he pulled Magnus’ chair behind a bench and sat down, “I need to talk to you about something,” he said awkwardly.

Alec nodded, “Don’t worry, I’ve been looking at places to move into, I can probably swing it if I get a loan and get back to work…”

“…What are you talking about?”

“Moving out, it had to happen eventually right?”

“You’re such an idiot. I don’t want you to move out, not unless you want to?”

“No, I mean, it’s your place, it’s up to you.”

Magnus sighed, “I’m actually quite enjoying having you here. I didn’t realise how lonely I was living alone.”

Alec cleared his throat, “If you don’t want me to move out, what is it?”

“So, I’m going to have to go back to work after the weekend, is that okay? I know I planned to have more time off but I couldn’t get it off and…”

“…now who’s being an idiot?”

“What?”

“Magnus, I’ll be fine, don’t worry about it.”

Magnus smiled, “You’re not just saying that?”

“Of course not,”

“I work 9 to 5 anyway, so I can still help you with your meds and stuff.”

“I’ll figure it out.”

“Okay,” the two of them looked across at the table at each other their eyes not moving before they realised how intense it was and both of them looked away, “Are you excited for your birthday next week?”

Alec shrugged, “Not really… it’s going to be weird.”

“I get that, do you want to do anything?”

“I’d rather just stay in.”

“Well Jace goes back to California the day after doesn’t he? We could invite him and Izzy round, just chill in the apartment?”

“Sounds good,” Alec said, rubbing his eyes.

“You look tired, have you not been sleeping?” Magnus asked.

“Rude,” Alec teased.

“Don’t worry you still look great, you’ve got this kind of rugged war soldier vibe going on, it kind of turns me on.”

Alec raised his eyebrows at Magnus, “This,” he gestured to himself, “Turns you on?”

“It’s charming.”

Alec laughed, “I don’t think anyone has ever called me charming before.”

“Well, they certainly should have.”

“Are you flirting with me?”

Magnus grinned, “I don’t know, maybe, I’m definitely appreciating your good looks though.”

Alec’s cheeks flushed red, “Well, I can’t say that I haven’t taken the time to appreciate yours either.”

“Wow, flirting back. I wasn’t aware you had the capacity to do that.”

“I’m full of surprises.”

“Clearly,” Magnus said, shocked himself, but hiding it well at how easily Alec had admitted that he found him attractive and also kind of flattered. “Seriously though, are you really not sleeping?”

“I don’t know, the nightmares, they kind of make it hard to fall back asleep.”

“What are they about?”

Alec chewed on his lip nervously, “It’s stupid.”

“You’ve been through a lot Alexander, nothing is stupid.”

“Rhett comes into the room, he says these things,” he debated whether to tell him what but decided against it, Magnus would only tell him that they weren’t true which was nice of him, but Alec knew that they were. “Then, well, then he tries to strangle me.”

“That explains why you hold your breath.”

“Yeah, I usually wake up after that.”

Magnus thought to himself for a second, “In the nightmare, can you stand up to him, tell him to leave, fight back?”

Alec shook his head, “It’s like I’m frozen.”

“You could you know, try it next time. Your brain is making you relive this over and over again, making you have this experience of feeling weak vulnerable, but maybe you can use that vulnerability in a good way. Overpower what’s going on in the dream, wake up, say something back,” he sighed, “I could be talking rubbish, but maybe it could work.”

“Maybe,” Alec said, “I’ll definitely try.”

“And I’m right next to you, maybe I can become a part of the nightmare and punch him for you.”

Alec laughed, “I’d kind of like to see that.”

“Then try and make it happen.”

Alec thought about what Magnus had said that night as he tried to fall asleep. Magnus wanted him to use his weakness as strength or something like that, but little did he know was that one of the things that made Alec feel particularly weak was that he had to be here, with Magnus looking after him. Which posed the question, if he used Magnus as a source of his weakness to tell Rhett to stop if it would end the nightmare early. It was complicated, but all Magnus wanted was it to end, he needed to sleep, to fight away his demons but that was harder than it seemed.


	9. Birthdays Can Be Beautiful

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! 
> 
> This is the penultimate chapter of #BPfic! Hope you all enjoy it. 
> 
> Thank you for reading and have a great day! 
> 
> Amy x

Chapter 9: Birthdays Can Be Beautiful

Alec woke up at a slightly later time than usual, the space where Magnus usually lay empty beside him and the curtains still closed, it would have been unusual if it wasn’t an instant reminder that it was Alec’s birthday. To put it bluntly, Alec didn’t exactly feel like celebrating and he most certainly didn’t feel like having his family fuss all over him. The fact that Magnus hadn’t woken Alec up was already a form of special treatment as for the past few weeks he had been adamant that just because he was recovering, it didn’t mean that he could sleep all morning.

“Magnus!” Alec shouted as he rearranged himself on the bed.

The bedroom door opened fairly quickly in response, “Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday Alexander, happy birthday to you!” Magnus sang as he entered the room, “How can I be of service?”

Alec couldn’t help but laugh at Magnus’ extravagance, “Could you pass the crutches? I’m going to go shower.”

“Of course, do you want breakfast?”

“I can make it,” Alec said taking the crutches of Magnus as he swung himself off the bed.

“Alexander, it’s your birthday. It would be my honour to make breakfast for you. French toast?”

“Sure,” Alec said, smiling at Magnus who could apparently only ever be kind to him, something that he wasn’t used to in the slightest.

“I’ll see you in the kitchen.”

Alec nodded in response and waited for Magnus to leave before he looked over at his phone, his heart sinking as several messages from Rhett popped up, just like they did every morning, although today there were considerably more.

23:30 – I miss you Alec. Come back to me.

23:35 – I’ll change, I promise.

23:50 – Don’t ignore me, I need to talk to you.

23:55 – There’s something missing when you’re not here.

00:00 – Happy Birthday! You’re the best person in my life and I hope you have the best day (ps. I bet I was the first person to text you).

8:24 – I love you.

Magnus couldn’t hear the shower running from the kitchen like he usually could so headed back into the bedroom to make sure that Alec hadn’t tripped or anything. Only to find his body hunched over his phone reading through something that looked seemingly important. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” Alec said, sniffing and rubbing his eyes.

“You don’t look it,” Magnus said walking towards Alec.

Alec sighed, “It’s just Rhett, he sent some texts… It’s stupid.”

“I wish you’d stop saying that.”

“Saying what?”

“That it’s stupid.”

“To be upset over the fact that I’ve broken up with my abusive boyfriend that almost killed me? I’d say that’s pretty stupid.”

Magnus shook his head stubbornly, “He was still your boyfriend, you loved him once. You don’t just get over that no matter what the context.”

“You give all this advice Magnus, but how do you know for sure? This is stupid, it’s obviously stupid I just need to grow some balls and get over it.”

“Look at me,” Magnus commanded, “For all I know, I could be wrong, I’ve never been through anything like you have, but, I’ve seen a lot of people who have. Parents that bring their kids into my office for annual check-ups when they’re covered in bruises themselves yet still stay with their spouse or partner for the sake of the kids. It’s not a black and white situation Alexander, it’s complicated and whatever you’re feeling. It’s justified.”

Alec exhaled slowly, “I just wish I could move on, pretend it never happened.”

“And erase a part of your story, perhaps the part that has made you the strongest you’ve ever been…”

“…Magnus,”

“You got away Alexander, that takes guts.” The two of them looked at each other both of them feeling the unspoken connection between them as they let themselves sit in the conversation. “Come on,” Magnus said, breaking the silence, “Time to shower.”

* * *

It was hard for Magnus to know what to do on a day like today, where he was conflicted with his desires to celebrate Alec’s birthday properly or to just stay in with Alec and let him deal with the day hour by hour. He had decided on what Alec originally wanted to do, Jace and Izzy were on their way over and they were just going to chill in Magnus’ apartment, have a few drinks, relax, it just didn’t seem like much of a celebration. It was something they could do any night if they wanted to.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!” Izzy’s voice said from outside the apartment door and quickly inside the apartment as she ran towards Alec’s direction, “Happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday…”

“…I think he gets the message Iz,” Jace said entering the apartment and giving Alec a quick hug, “Happy birthday bro.”

“Thanks guys.”

“Now who’s for champagne?!” Magnus said as he popped the cork.

The evening continued the way you’d expect it to continue, drinks, music, conversation, whilst it was hard for him to admit it, Alec was enjoying himself. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d let himself open up his heart to the joy of the people around him and it was refreshing to say the least. That evening he let himself laugh, relax, and appreciate the time he was spending with the people that cared about him, because he knew now that life was too short to spend it shut away. He’d wasted 5 years of his life being trapped in the toxicity of his relationship and even if his heart still hurt, he was determined to never feel like that again.

“Right, present time,” Magnus said, a bottle of champagne later. Standing up from the sofa and heading into the airing cupboard.

“It’s not much Alec, but I figured you could use for… I don’t know, a date or something,” Izzy said suggestively, handing Alec a voucher for a restaurant.

Alec smiled, “I love it Iz, thanks.”

Jace looked over at Alec and smiled awkwardly, “So, I couldn’t really afford a present, I spent way too much on the flights over here and with Clary being pregnant,”

“It’s fine Jace,”

“And now for the big reveal!” Magnus said dramatically, placing his hands-on Alec’s shoulders and standing behind him, “Izzy, run grab it,” he hushed.

“What on earth is going on?” Alec said.

“Don’t ruin the moment, Magnus has been planning this all week,” Jace said as Izzy passed the large box to Magnus.

Magnus placed the box over Alec’s head, resting it on his lap then hopped over the back of the sofa and sat back down next to him, “Happy Birthday Alexander.”

Izzy glanced across at Jace who was watching his brother and Magnus intently, he could see it too now, how deep their connection ran. How there was something between the two of them that was not only unspoken but also indescribable. They both wanted Alec to be happy and to be loved, to be in a relationship where the love is equal and peaceful, a relationship that is healthy and happy and full of all the good things. Like Izzy and Simon, and Jace and Clary were.

“What is it?”

“Just open it,” Magnus said nudging Alec playfully.

Alec started to peel away the tape, his heart racing for a reason he couldn’t explain. He hadn’t expected a present from anyone, especially not Magnus who had already given him so much in his care and hospitality. He opened the box, releasing a shaky breath as he looked down at the instrument in front of him.

“Magnus,” he gasped, wanting to cry as he pulled the guitar out of the box, it’s familiar feel bringing back something into his life that he’d forgotten he was missing.

“It’s vintage apparently, the guy at the shop said it was a good one, although I don’t really know much about guitars, he could have just been trying to make a sale, it works though…” Magnus was interrupted as Alec’s arms wrapped around him, pulling him close to Alec’s chest which was rising and falling heavily. Magnus pulled away, “I know it’ll never have the same meaning as your old one, but, I figured you could do with a release.”

“You shouldn’t have done this Magnus.”

Magnus reached up and wiped the tears threatening to fall from Alec’s eyes, “I wanted to,” he stopped for a second, “Come on then, play us a song.”

“I was kind of practicing this before, well, you know. So it’s a bit rough,”

“Oh, shush Alec, you’ll sound amazing anyway,” Izzy said coming to sit beside him as her brother started to strum the opening chords.

_“It's not simple to say,_   
_ That most days I don't recognize me_   
_ That these shoes and this apron_   
_ That place and its patrons_   
_ Have taken more than I gave them_   
_ It's not easy to know_   
_ I'm not anything like I used be, although it's true_   
_ I was never attention's sweet centre_   
_ I still remember that boy_

_He's imperfect, but He tries_   
_ He is good, but he lies_   
_ He is hard on himself_   
_ He is broken and won't ask for help_   
_ He is messy, but he's kind_   
_ He is lonely most of the time_   
_ He is all of this mixed up and brewed in a beautiful tea_   
_ He is gone, but he used to be mine…”_

_A few laughs interrupted the silence in _the room at Alec’s spontaneous changing of the words, lightening the atmosphere slightly that was empty as everyone knew what the song was about. How he’d felt, how he wanted to change, it was like this was his way of explaining everything, it was harrowing, but had a kind of beauty to it.

_“…For a chance to start over and rewrite an ending or two  
For the boy that I knew_

_Who'll be reckless, just enough_   
_ Who'll get hurt, but who learns how to toughen up_   
_ When he's bruised and gets used by a man who can't love_   
_ And then he'll get stuck_   
_ And be scared of the life that's inside him_   
_ Growing stronger each day 'til it finally reminds him_   
_ To fight just a little, to bring back the fire in his eyes_   
_ That's been gone, but used to be mine_   
_ Used to be mine_

_He is messy, but He's kind_   
_ He is lonely most of the time_   
_ He is all of this mixed up and brewed in a beautiful tea_   
_ He is gone, but He used to be mine.”_

* * *

“Fucking hell Alec, you almost made me tear up and I am not one to cry,” Jace said, unable to hide how proud he was of his older brother. He’d always be proud of him, no matter what, when they were little it was Alec who was the protector, the one that would look out for himself and Izzy. The roles had been switched for a few weeks, like they should be in every sibling relationship, Jace had wanted to be there for Alec, but knowing that things were getting back on track for him was more than reassuring.

“I do have one very important question though Alec,” Izzy said,

“What?”

“Is Magnus your Dr. Pomatter?”

Alec laughed as he looked over at Magnus who didn’t understand the question at all, “I suppose he is, without the kissing and sex though.”

“I am so confused.”

Alec grinned, “The song was from a musical, ‘Waitress’, I’m kind of like Jenna, you’re kind of like Dr. Pomatter, it’s strangely fitting for my life so far, now that I think about it.”

“It really is,” Izzy imputed.

“Well… if you want to make it fit more, I wouldn’t say no.”

Vomiting noises came from where Jace was sat, “Izzy, I think this is our cue to leave.”

Izzy laughed, “Jace is probably right.”

“He was joking, you guys can stay longer if you want? Right Magnus?”

“It’s up to you guys.”

Izzy and Jace looked at each other, “I think we’ll leave you too it.”

“And I have a flight first thing and still need to pack.”

Alec stood up, balancing himself on the arm of the sofa, “It’s been good to see you Jace.”

“You too Alec. I’ll come back soon, I promise.”

“You better.”

“I will.”

“Goodnight guys,” Izzy said giving Alec one last hug, “Enjoy the rest of your birthday.”

Alec looked across at Magnus, a spark in his eye as he watched him put the remaining champagne glasses in the dishwasher. He couldn’t help but imagine a future with Magnus one laced with romance and passion and he almost felt guilty for it, he was moving on from Rhett so quickly that it didn’t make sense. He’d been tied down because he couldn’t imagine a life without him but now that he was a living a life without him it was as though he could finally see again. Right now, he was seeing a potential love that could run deeper than anything he’d ever had before.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! 
> 
> This is the final chapter of Breaking Point, thank you all so much for reading, your comments have really reassured me when writing about something that is so serious. 
> 
> Thanks again and have a great day, 
> 
> Amy x

Chapter 10: Unbroken 

1 MONTH LATER 

Alec looked at himself in the mirror, he looked good, black jeans, a white shirt, it was a tried and tested combo and the removal of crutches and a cast was particularly reassuring. He was ready to go out and face the world, to be confident enough to show Magnus that he was actually ready and that he wasn’t just saying it.

He ruffled his collar, making sure it was neat before giving himself a reassuring nod in the mirror before heading to Magnus’ room, “Are you,” he stopped in his tracks, “you look incredible.”

Magnus finished tying up his shoe and smiled at Alec, getting up off his bed and walking over to him, “I’m ready, but… are you sure you want to do this?”

Alec nodded, “I’ve never been more certain of anything in my life.”

“Well, how can I argue with that?”

“You can’t,” he hesitated for a second, “I really want to kiss you right now.”

Magnus laughed, “I wouldn’t protest if you did.”

“Good,” Alec said leaning in to kiss Magnus, his hand holding the back of Magnus’ head as he continued to kiss him, not wanting to stop.

“Okay, calm down Alexander. We have places to be remember. Go grab your guitar, I need to put aftershave on.”

Alec grinned as he headed into the living room. Things had kind of… escalated, since the night of his birthday, whilst Alec’s emotions had been all over the place, one thing that had remained the same was how he was feeling for Magnus. Without Rhett in the picture it had become increasingly harder to hide those feelings, and they were sharing a bed together, which ultimately led to… well it was obvious what it led to.

“Do you think he’ll come?” Alec asked, his hand locked in Magnus’ as they walked down the familiar streets that would take them to the café that Alec had started working at two weeks ago.

Magnus shrugged, “I don’t know, he seems to have moved on…”

“…but you never know.”

“Do you want him to come?”

Alec shook his head, “No, but if he did… I don’t think I’d care that much either.”

Magnus pulled Alec’s hand up to his lips and kissed it softly, “I’m so proud of you.”

Alec’s cheeks flushed red, “Let’s wait until after the show for that… it’s bad luck.”

“Bad luck?”

“It might not be, I just…”

“…You’re nervous aren’t you?” Magnus said, noticing the shake in his boyfriend’s hands.

“I haven’t performed in front of a crowd in 5 years Magnus, what if I’m no good anymore?”

The two of them stopped outside the café and Magnus tilted Alec’s head so he was looking him directly in the eyes, “You are good, you’re more than good, you’re incredible, so get out there and kill that crowd. I’ll be watching every minute.”

Alec nodded, “You’re right, I’ve got this,” Alec said, persuading himself more than anyone as they entered the café turned lounge and approached the table where Izzy and Simon were sat. Alec took a shot from one of the waitresses and downed it, “I’ve got this.”

Magnus chuckled to himself, “You’ve got this.”

“You’ve got this?” Izzy imputed, wanting to join the conversation.

Magnus slid in the spare chair next to Izzy, “Go on, get yourself ready.”

Alec nodded, “I’ll see you on the flip side,” he said heading over to the makeshift stage.

Izzy glanced over at Magnus, a confused expression on her face, “Did he seriously just say, ‘I’ll see you on the flip side’?”

“Apparently so.”

“He’s been spending too much time with Simon.”

“Hey!” Simon jumped in, ready to defend himself, “I have never said that in my life.”

“Yeah, but it’s something you would say,” Izzy said leaning in to kiss him on the lips, “and I love you for that.”

* * *

The gig went well, of course it did. For Alec getting back up on the stage was something that he knew he needed to do but also couldn’t imagine the feeling of doing again, but when he was up there, it was like coming home. This was what he loved to do, and he was finally back doing it, living the life that he had always dreamed of in a world that was the same that he had always been in but seemed to be completely different now that he had opened his eyes. For Magnus it was an enlightening experience as well, watching his boyfriend, the man that he’d fallen in love with quicker than he could ever have imagined open up, become this inspirational person on stage. Singing songs that packed an emotional punch but also entertaining the crowd, he was like a different person out there, but Magnus knew that no matter how successful Alec became. He would always have his Alexander, to hold, to cuddle, to kiss and to love because the bond he felt with him didn’t seem like one that could be broken.

“You,” Magnus kissed Alec on the lips, “Are,” another kiss, “amazing,” he said, ending it with a proper kiss.

“Get a room!” Izzy jested from the table.

“We will,” Magnus said, “Unless you want to stay for a drink Alexander?”

“I’m good.”

“Perfect, we’ll see you later,” Magnus said.

“You were amazing Alec,” Izzy said, giving her brother the knowing look that they frequently exchanged between each other.

“Maybe we can work on some music together sometime?” Simon said.

“Sounds like a plan, I’ll see you soon okay?”

“Goodnight.”

“Night,” Magnus said, taking hold of Alec’s hand as they headed home. “I love you,” he whispered into Alec’s ear.

Alec grinned, he hadn’t expected to hear those words so soon, but he wasn’t going to push them away, not when he didn’t have to think twice about his reply, “I love you too.”

The two of them walked back home in silence, there wasn’t much more to say, that was it, they loved each other and when you love each other all you need is each other.

* * *

“Do you want a drink? Celebrate your first step into your new career?” Magnus said as they entered the door to the apartment.

“I think I just want you.”

“Well that’s awfully suggestive.”

Alec laughed, “Surprisingly, I didn’t actually mean it like that.”

“What did you mean?”

“Gin & tonic in bed?”

Magnus grinned as he pecked Alec on the lips, “I’d love that.” He watched as Alec rubbed his eyes, “I also love it when you’re like this.”

“Like what?”

“All sleepy.”

“You like it when I’m sleepy?”

Magnus nodded as he started to measure out the gin, “Yeah.”

“Why?”

He poured in the tonic, “Because when you’re sleepy all you ever want to do is cuddle… it’s very cute.”

Alec picked up his gin from the counter, “I want to be annoyed that you just called me cute, but…”

“…You know I’m right?”

Alec laughed, “Yeah.”

“Well, cheers to a good night and cuddles?”

Alec nodded as they clinked glasses and headed into the bedroom. It was nice when it was like this, the two of them, peaceful just living normal lives, going to bed together, waking up together, there was something charming about the domesticity of it all. It had never been like that with Rhett which was why Alec had this desire to make the most of every little thing that he could. Magnus was his second chance and he wasn’t going to screw it up.

“Hurry up!” Alec moaned from the bed as Magnus pulled his shirt off.

“Give me a chance!”

“You’re taking forever.”

“How on earth have I ended up with such a needy boyfriend?” Magnus teased as he pulled back the covers and slid into bed beside Alec, kissing him before he got himself comfortable.

“Needy?” Alec questioned clambering on top of Magnus and kissing his torso, trailing the kisses till he was about to reach his lips before he stopped. “I’ll pass,” he said rolling back to his side of the bed. 

“Fuck you,” Magnus said, laughing at Alec’s teasing.

“You already have.”

“Oh, someone’s feeling funny today aren’t they?”

“I’m hilarious constantly.”

“Okay, sure thing,” Magnus replied back sarcastically. Alec turned so he was facing Magnus, puppy dog eyes melting Magnus as he pulled his boyfriend towards him so that he was laying on his chest. Alec’s arm laced over Magnus’ stomach his head perfectly positioned in the crook of Magnus’ neck, they looked like they belonged together, and honestly they really did. “Everything okay?” Magnus asked, fiddling with Alec’s hair nonchalantly.

“Yeah.”

“You sure?”

Alec sighed, “Was tonight really okay? I swear I was out of tune for most of it…”

“…Shush. You couldn’t have been more perfect, stop doubting yourself.”

“Do you think I can make something from this?”

“Do you?”

Alec traced random patterns up and down Magnus’ stomach before he breathed in, “Rhett always said that I wouldn’t,” he said as he rolled his body off Magnus.

Magnus sighed and wrapped his body around Alec, not letting him escape that easily, “He was saying that to make you feel bad, to keep you at home with him, away from the bright lights of the real world.”

“How do you know that though?”

“Look at me.” Alec turned his head. “I know it because I see you Alexander, every single part of you. It doesn’t matter what he said in the past, it was obviously bullshit because you are so talented, the crowd tonight didn’t want you to stop singing you were that good and whenever I hear you sing, or play guitar, the way it makes me feel… well, only someone incredible could make me feel that.”

“God, you always know what to say don’t you?”

Magnus smiled, “I try my best.”

“I’m so fucking lucky to have you.”

“Well that’s true.”

“So modest.”

Magnus grinned, “Shut up and kiss me.”

Alec laughed, “With pleasure.”

The two of them fell asleep that night with their hearts full, this was their life now and they both couldn’t be more content. Alec had been saved, but what Magnus hadn’t known was how much he’d needed Alec as well, someone to be there for him. He spent all day every day helping patient after patient and Alec was always there to comfort him when things went wrong. They’d very quickly become each other’s support systems and had created a level of trust between the two of them that led to a relationship that couldn’t be questioned. They were made for each other and for Alec, he had needed to be broken before he could remake himself and become the person that he had always wanted to be, with the person that he always knew he needed, right by his side.


End file.
